Estella: This way, you pathetic squirt of vaginal discharge!............This way, you beef-witted shriveled-up monkey's penis!.............Up here, you gamy mass of baby vomit!
Pip: Eho. After you, miss.
Estella: I'm not going in there, you stupid puddle of a homeless man urine!

Pip: Righty-o. What are we going to play?
Estella: We're going to play a little game called, "Smack the Blond Boy In the Head With a Large Log."
Pip: Oh, yes! My sister and I play that game at home all the time!
Estella: Oh you stupid pathetic boy!
(Estella runs off)

Don't worry; sister is still taking very good care of me. She just loves to smack me in the face and tell me I'm worthless!

If Ms. Havisham is determined to do this to others, let's go KICK HER ASS!

Pip: Joe, do you know anything about girls?
Joe: Sure. They're those things with vaginas in them.
Pip: Yes, but do you know anything about them?

Pip: Lets hear it for Cartman's fat ass!
(Cartman throws a rock at Pip's temple)
Cartman: Do British people count as an ethnicity?
Stan: Nah.
Cartman: Sweet.

Stan: There are no more missions. I have everything I want.
Butters: But we're angels? What are angels supposed to do without missions?
Stan: Just play something else!
Pip: Oh dear! We've angered Bosley!

Pip: Cheerio Stan, I do say, it's quite a nice surprise seeing you here.
Stan: Shut up Pip.

Stan: Think you can hit the target, Pip?
Pip: Of course. I'll have you know I was Archery Esquire at Straffordshire.
Stan: Be sure to hit something nice and solid now.
(Pip hits the back of Barbrady's head.)

Pip: Are you sure you don't want to play Stan?
Stan: No!
Dougie: What are you. a sour puss?
Butters: You really ought play Stan, it's an awfully fun game. I've never been to England, but I bet the people are real nice. Are people nice in England Pip? I bet they are, huh? They got those big noses and all.

Pip: We were just playing a game called 'Whickershams and Degglers.' Do you want to play?
Stan: No!
Pip: I'm the head whicker nicker, and you are all little whickershams. We all sing 'The Merry Tune of Stratford' until I say 'Terah!' And then you all fall down laughing, and I join you as I find it funny too.

Pip: Can I be Jaclyn Smith? Can I?
Butters: No, uh, I get to be Jaclyn Smith. See, I thought of Charlie's Angels and I get to be Jaclyn Smith c-cause I thought of it.

South Park Quotes

(Pulls out an automatic) Hello girls! I'm the easter bunny!

Janet Reno

Chinpokomon Executive: You are American.
South Park Toy Store Owner: Yes.
Chinpokomon Executive: Ohhh, you must have very big penis!
South Park Toy Store Owner: Excuse me, I was just asking you what your up to with these toys.
Chinpokomon Executive: Nothing, we are very simple people with very small penis. Mr. Hosik's penis is especially small!
Mr. Hosik: So small.
Chinpokomon Executive: We cannot achieve so much with such small penis, but you American wow, penis so big, so big penis!
South Park Toy Store Owner: Well aah I guess it is pretty good size.