Leonard: I'm not going to make a fake appointment with a psychiatrist. What would I say is wrong with me?
Koothrappali: Low self esteem.
Howard: Social anxiety.
Sheldon: Sexual insecurity.
Leonard: None of that is true.
Penny: Denial. See sweetie, the list goes on and on.

Age is a state of mind, Leonard. In here, I'm 90.

Blue Icees and a trip to the container store? It's like I died and went to the postmortem neuron induced hallucination commonly mistaken as heaven.

Sheldon: After all these years. I'm really happy for the two of you.
Penny: Awww, thank you.
Sheldon: Now get out of my spot.

My aunt and uncle were married sixty-three years. Towards the end it was like watching cheese melt.

Sheldon: Amy's mad at me, and I'm not clear why.
Penny: Okay were you talking before you she got upset?
Sheldon: Yes.
Penny: That's probably it.

Starting to watch a television show that might run for years isn't a decision to take lightly. I'm wrestling with a big commitment issue here.

Amy: Can you believe it's been five years since our first date?
Sheldon: I know. Do you think I should start watching The Flash TV Show?
Amy: That's what you're thinking about?

My mother's been there for every award I’ve won since I beat out my twin sister for the did it on the potty trophy.

Sheldon: Won't that void the warranty?
Howard: Sheldon, I have a masters degree in engineering. I wipe my bottom with warranties. Except for Apple Care. That pays for itself in the long run.

All I see is a black screen. And my own reflection. I look sad.

Sheldon: Aren't you afraid of being blinded?
Leonard: How would I be blinded?
Sheldon: At the end of the ceremony, all the students throw those pointy hats in the air. It's all pomp and circumstance until someone loses an eye.

TBBT Quotes

I won't say that all senior citizens who can't master technology should be publicly flogged, but if we made an example of one or two, it might give the others incentive to try harder.

Sheldon

Sheldon: Why do you have the Chinese character for "soup" tattooed on your right buttock?
Penny: It's not "soup," it's "courage."
Sheldon: No it isn't. But I suppose it does take courage to demonstrate that kind of commitment to soup.
Penny: How'd you see it? You said you wouldn't look.
Sheldon: Sorry. As I told you, the hero always peeks.