Shirley Quotes
I can't believe Jeff attacked a table with a fire axe and is still only the second craziest person in the room.
Actually, Jeff, he's been pretty decent in this game, so far. He's created a safe zone where people can rest, eat, and in some cases, pump their breast milk.
Shirley: I hope we find this cache of ammunition soon. I need to pump.
Troy: Me too. You're talking about peeing right?
Sorry Abed, I don't feel comfortable with you taking a grand tour of my nethers.
Britta: I read an article that said some women can actually achieve or--
Shirley: No no, thank you for the conversation. I know what you're talking about and even if it were true that's not something a woman does on her child's head.
Abed: Don't tell any doctors I said this, but at this point in the situation the bus pretty much drives itself.
Shirley: Who is the bus in this scenario?
An epidural is a proper Christian woman's only chance to get wrecked.
I don't want my child's first memory to be Starburns.
Shirley: Can somebody please all Andre? It's Sugarboots in my phone.
Troy: That hurts Shirley.
Shirley: This is not your baby Chang.
Chang: How do you know?
Shirley: Because I don't see any locusts.
Can we please stop fighting? We're starting to hurt innocent perverts.
Jeff: It's called chemistry. I have it with everybody.
Shirley: Everybody? I haven't felt any of that chemistry coming my way. I don't know if it's because your racist or because I intimidate you sexually, but I know it's one of those two.
