Shirley Quotes
Shirley: The Bible has been called the greatest story ever told.
Abed: Ben Lyons said the same thing about I Am Legend.
You don't know that. It was the '80s. Everybody who made this was on cocaine.
Yeah, you're both so different. Skinny bitches.
Are you being meta?
Shirley [to Abed]
Holy macaroni with pepper jack.
Troy: You thinkin' what I'm thinkin'?
Shirley: Mmhmm. Our team's walking with God.
Shirley: I hated Sam and Diane.
Annie: Who are Sam and Diane?
Shirley: Okay, we get it. You're young!
My boys are going to make me breakfast in bed for mother's day. Well, actually I'm goin' to make the breakfast and get in bed, but they're going to bring it to me.
Annie: When you found out I was Jewish, you invited me to a 'pool party' that turned out to be a Baptism.
Shirley: Well excuse me for trying to sneak you into Heaven.
Troy: He released Annie's Boobs. Annie's Boobs could be anywhere.
Shirley: We get it! You named your monkey Annie's Boobs.
I caught him stuffing my man full of chicken, and Tyler Perry has a whole series of movies about why that's wrong.
Annie: I want to be security.
Shirley: Let's do it together, we can be partners.
Abed: That's a buddy cop movie I would watch. Which one of you would be the by-the-books cop and which of you would be the bad ass?
Shirley: Oh, Abed, you're so silly. I'd be the bad ass.
