(Grampa and Bart pay a visit to Herman's Military Antiques.)
Herman: What's the password?
Grampa: Let me in, you idiot!
Herman: Right you are!
(Herman lets them in the store.)
Grampa: So, Herman, has the large-type edition of this month's Solider Of Fortune come in yet?
Herman: Uh, not yet. But, can I interest you in some authentic Nazi underpants?
Grampa: No! Actually, we came over because I want you to meet my grandson, Bart.
Herman: Ah. Hello, young American.
Bart: Hello, sir. Uh, Mr. Herman?
Herman: Yes?
Bart: (Stutters) Did you lose your arm in the war?
Herman: My arm? Well, let me put it this way. Next time your teacher tells you to keep your arm inside the bus window, you do it!
Bart: Yes, sir, I will.

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Bart Simpson
The Simpsons Season 1 Episode 5: "Bart the General"
The Simpsons
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The Simpsons Season 1 Episode 5 Quotes

Armistice treaty, article four. "Nelson is never again to raise his fists in anger." Article five. "Nelson recognizes Bart's right to exist." Article six. "Although Nelson shall have no official power, he shall remain a figurehead of menace in the neighborhood."


Bart: Okay, we all know why we're here, right?
Milhouse: No, why?
Bart: To fight Nelson, the bully. That guy has been tormenting all of us for years, and I for one am sick of it! I can't promise you victory. I can't promise you good times. But the one thing I do know--
(All the boys file out.)
Bart: Whoa! Whoa! I promise you victory! I promise you good times!