D'Arcy: Shit, I didn't think of it. I should have told you to bring Kate. She would love this.
Ben: Oh, she, uh, took Max to her mom's for a couple nights.
D'Arcy: Oh, Benny all alone. Let me guess, cartoons and cereal for breakfast, cartoons and cereal for dinner.
Ben: The definition of a perfect day. And with Kate gone, I don't have to worry about holding in my farts.
D'Arcy: You don't fart around your wife. What's the point of being married if you can't fart around your wife?
Ben: [chuckles] Eh, I don't do a lot of things around Kate.
D'Arcy: What does that mean?
Ben: I don't know. Sometimes I feel I can't be myself in front of her. Can't do the things that I want to do.
D'Arcy: I thought you guys were getting along great. The way she talks about it, your place is all handcuffs and frozen dildos.


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Resident Alien Season 2 Episode 6: "An Alien in New York"
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Resident Alien
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Resident Alien Season 2 Episode 6 Quotes

Deputy, look. I appreciate mythical creatures; I really do. Well, except for mermaids. You know, where do they get off sittin' up on the rocks all high and mighty, expecting you to ask them out on a date. I mean, why they so stuck up? I mean, if you half fish, you gonna smell all like fish, you understand?

Mike

Mike: I'm just tired. You know, Cletus is in this humpin' phase. I had to spend half the night defendin' my easy char. Speakin' of, you know anything about gettin' stains out of couch cushions? I mean deep stains.
Ben: Nope. Know anything about gettin' disgusting images out of my head?