Buffy the Vampire Slayer Quotes
Willow: I mean, why else would she be acting like such a b-i-t-c-h?
Giles: Willow, I think we're a little too old to be spelling things out.
Xander: A "bitca"?
Cordelia: I’m gonna give you some advice: Get over it.
Buffy: Excuse me?
Cordelia: Whatever is causing the Joan Collins 'tude, deal with it. Embrace the pain. Spank your inner moppet. Whatever. But get over it, because pretty soon you’re not even gonna have the loser friends you’ve got now.
Buffy: I think it’s about time you start minding your own business.
Cordelia: It’s all in the past.
Cordelia: You're really campaigning for “Bitch of the Year”, aren't you?
Buffy: As defending champion, you nervous?
Cordelia: I can hold my own.
Buffy: Hi.
Angel: Hi.
Buffy: So, is there danger at The Bronze? Should I beware?
Angel: I can't help thinking I've done something to make you angry. And that bothers me more than I'd like.
Buffy: I'm not angry. I don't know where that comes from.
Angel: What are you afraid of? Me? Us?
Buffy: Could you contemplate getting over yourself for a second? There's no “us”. Look Angel, I'm sorry if I was supposed to spend the summer mooning over you, but I didn't. I moved on...to the living.
The Master: Did you really think you could best me here when you couldn't below?
Buffy: You have fruit punch mouth.
The Master: What?
[She punches him]
Buffy: And save the hypnosis crap for the tourists.
Jenny: What do we do now?
Willow: We've gotta get to the library!
Cordelia: Library. Great!
[She turns the car around]
Willow: Of course, we generally walk there.
[Cordelia drives the car and crashes through the school’s door]
The Master: You tried. It was noble of you. You heard the prophecy that I was about to break free and you came to stop me. But prophecies are tricky creatures. They don't tell you everything. You're the one that sets me free. If you hadn't come, I couldn't go. Think about that.
[He bites her]
The Master: Oh, God...the power! By the way, I like your dress.
[He drops Buffy and she falls in the water]
Xander: You were looking at my neck.
Angel: What?
Xander: You were checking out my neck. I saw that.
Angel: No, I wasn't.
Xander: Just keep your distance, pal.
Angel: I wasn't looking at your neck.
Xander: I told you to eat before we left.
The Master: Welcome.
Buffy: Thanks for having me. You know, you really ought to talk to your contractor. Looks like you’ve got some water damage.
The Master: Oh, good. The feeble banter portion of the fight. Why don’t we just cut to the...
[She shoots her crossbow and he catches the arrow]
The Master: Nice shot.
Buffy: So that's it, huh? I remember the drill: one slayer dies, the next one's called. I wonder who she is. Will you train her or will they send someone else?
Giles: Buffy, I...
Buffy: Does it say how he's gonna kill me? Do you think it'll hurt?
[Angel walks to her and she moves]
Buffy: Don't touch me! Were you even gonna tell me?
Giles: I was hoping I wouldn't have to, that there was some way around it.
Buffy: I've got a way around it: I quit.
Giles: It's not that simple.
Buffy: I'm making it that simple! I quit! I resign! I'm fired! You can find someone else to stop The Master from taking over.
Giles: I'm not sure that anyone else can. All the signs indicate...
Buffy: Signs?
[She throws books at him]
Buffy: Read me the signs! Tell me my fortune! You're so useful, sitting here with all of your books! You're really a lot of help!
Giles: No, I don't suppose I am.
Angel: I know this is hard.
Buffy: What do you know about this? You're never gonna die.
Angel: You think I want anything to happen to you? Do you think I could stand it? We just gotta figure out a way...
Buffy: I already did. I quit, remember? Pay attention.
Giles: Buffy, if The Master rises...
Buffy: I don't care! I don't care. Giles, I'm 16 years old. I don't wanna die.
Giles: How exactly did you propose to hunt someone you can't see? You may have to work on listening to people.
Buffy: Very funny.
Giles: I thought so.
Cordelia: Hey, you think I'm never lonely because I'm so cute and popular? I can be surrounded by people and be completely alone. It's not like any of them REALLY know me. I don't even know if they like me half the time. People just want to be in a popular zone. Sometimes when I talk...everyone's so busy agreeing with me, they don't hear a word I say.
Buffy: Well, if you feel so alone, then why do you work so hard at being popular?
Cordelia: Well, it beats being alone all by yourself.
