Buffy the Vampire Slayer Quotes
Darla: You and I both know what you hunger for...what you need. Hey, it’s nothing to be ashamed of, it’s who we are. It’s what makes eternal life worth living. You can only suppress your real nature for so long. I can feel it brewing inside of you. I hope I’m around when it explodes...
[She grazes his chest]
Angel: Maybe you don’t want to be.
Darla: I’m not afraid of you. I bet she is though. Maybe I’m underestimating her? Talk to her, tell her about the curse. Maybe she’ll come around? And if she still doesn’t trust you, you’ll know where I’ll be.
[Darla leaves]
Xander: You're in love with a vampire? What are you outta your mind?!
Cordelia: What?
Xander: Not vampire. How could you love an umpire? Everyone hates them!
Cordelia: Where did you get that dress?!
[She chases another student]
Cordelia Chase: This is a one-of-a-kind Todd Oldham. Do you know how much this dress cost? Is this a knockoff? This is a knockoff, isn't it? Some cheesy knockoff! This is exactly what happens when you sign these free trade agreements!
Buffy: Think we have problems?
Rupert: It seems you encountered “The Three”. Warrior vampires, very proud and very strong.
Willow: How is it you always know this stuff? You always know what's going on. I never know what's going on.
Rupert: Well, you weren't here from midnight until six researching it.
Willow: No, I was sleeping.
Darla: Do you know what the saddest thing in the world is?
Buffy: Bad hair on top of that outfit?
Darla: To love someone who used to love you.
Buffy: You guys were involved?
Darla: For several generations.
Buffy: Well, you’ve been around since Columbus, you are bound to pile up a few exes. You’re older than him, right? Between us girls, you’re looking a little worn around the eyes.
Darla: I made him.
Buffy: Angel?
Angel: Hmm?
Buffy: Do you snore?
Angel: I don't know. It's been a long time since anybody's been in a position to let me know.
Giles: Xander's taken to teasing the less fortunate?
Buffy: Uh-huh.
Giles: And, uh, there's a noticeable change in both clothing and demeanor?
Buffy: Yes.
Giles: And, well, otherwise, all his spare time's spent lounging about with imbeciles?
Buffy: It's bad, isn't it?
Giles: It's devastating. He's turned into a sixteen-year-old boy. Of course, you'll have to kill him.
Buffy: They didn't hurt him, did they?
Giles: They...uh...ate him.
[Willow sits down]
Buffy: They ate Principal Flutie?
Willow: Ate him up?
Giles: The official theory wild dogs got into his office, somehow. There was no one on the scene.
Willow: You missed it!
Buffy: Missed what?
Xander: We just saw the zebras mating. Thank you, very exciting.
Willow: It was like the Heimlich...with stripes!
Buffy: And I missed it. And yet somehow I’ll find the courage to move on.
Willow: Xander, what’s wrong with you?
Xander: I guess you’ve noticed that I’ve been different around you lately.
Willow: Yes...
Xander: I think...um...I think my feelings for you have been changing and well, we’ve been friends for such a long time, then I feel like I need to tell you something. I’ve decided to drop geometry, so I won’t be needing your math help anymore which means I won’t have to look at your pasty face again.
Cordelia: Owen! Look at you here, all alone.
Owen: Cordelia, I’m here with Buffy.
Cordelia: Oh, okay. You want to dance?
Owen: No...I’m still here with Buffy.
Cordelia: You are so good to help the needy.
Buffy: Cordelia, Owen and I would like to be alone right now. And for that to happen, you would have to go somewhere that’s away.
[Buffy pulls Owen in closer to dance]
Cordelia: Well, when you’re ready for the big leagues, let me know.
Buffy: This is the ‘90s. The 1990s in point and fact, and I can do both! Clark Kent has a job. I just want to go on a date.
Giles: Well, I suppose it was a fairly slim lead.
Buffy: Thank you, thank you, thank you! And look, I won’t go far, okay. If the apocalypse comes, beep me.
Xander: So you just went home?
Buffy: What was I supposed to do, say to Owen, “Sorry I was late. I was sitting in a cemetery with a librarian waiting for a vampire to rise so I could prevent an evil prophecy from coming to pass?”
Xander: Or...flat tire?!
