The people who hold grudges are petty and small-minded. And I am neither of those things.

Sherlock [to Morland]

If I do manage to adopt a baby, you know the box of swords has to go.

Joan [to Sherlock]

Have you seen Raiders of the Lost Ark? It doesn't go well for the guy with the sword.

Marcus [to Blaine]

I wouldn't be the first Holmes man to underestimate [Moriarty].

Morland [to Sherlock]

Puppies are fine, sunsets are fine, this car is exquisite.

Alfredo [to Sherlock]

Sherlock: Nature sounds can reduce stress and increase focus.
Joan: I think they meant rain or waves, not horny wildebeests.

Sherlock: Their best-selling product is rectal cream. I don't know why they would be celebrated.
Joan: If you needed it, you would be celebrating.

You hold grudges. That's not good.

Alfredo [to Sherlock]

Sherlock: I will forgive [Mycroft].
Alfredo: And then ...
Sherlock: Maybe he'll forgive me. And I'll have my brother back.

Might I suggest a good, old-fashioned witch hunt?

Sherlock [to Gregson]

Someone got buried here, Fred. And you just cut them into pieces.

Foreman [to Fred]

You have someone staying at your place ... on purpose?

Marcus [to Sherlock]

Elementary Quotes

Agent Malick doesn't exactly play well with others.

Joan [to Marcus]

Justice is like an orgasm. It can never come too late.

Sherlock