Galavant Season 1 Quotes
Gareth: There should be a standardized system, based on the rotation of the earth, in relation to its position to the sun and the moon.
King Richard: You sound like a witch.
Can’t we just have a normal adventure?
Sid: You know someone should come up with something around the crotch that would just go zip. You could do your business and be done with it.
Galavant: That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard.
There it is. Valencia. How do you think this should go down. Do you think I should save the kingdom and then rescue Madelena? Or do you think I should rescue then save? I just want it to have a dramatic build you know? I mean either way, we’re all gonna live happily ever after.
At least let me change my clothes first. These are gang colors!
Jester
Galavant: Oh for the love of God, in your purse? That’s where you thought no one would look?
Isabella: I put it with my girl supplies. Guys never look there. They must have sisters.
Good lord, Gareth! Do you kiss my ring with that mouth?
King Richard
Isabella: Bandits. If only someone had warned us.
Galavant: Yeah, well, you snore.
You never complained. You never abandoned me. You never spit in my ale. [pause] Right? You’ve never done that?
King Richard: Eunuch, front and center. Help me out, what else did you used to do around here for fun?
Eunuch: Well, we used to have balls.
King Richard: [cracks up laughing] Gareth! Did you hear what the eunuch says? You cannot write this stuff!
Sid: You know the expression, it takes a village?
Galavant: No, I don't think that's been invented yet.
He's nothing but a jackass in a fancy metal can!
The Squires
