Gilmore Girls Season 2 Quotes
Rory: Taylor's wigging.
Lorelai: I know. He's been sitting there like the final days of Dick Nixon for almost an hour.
Lorelai: We're running out of coffee.
Luke: I'll make some more.
Lorelai: No, I got it.
Luke: Do you know how?
Lorelai: Do I... ugh... I am Cathy Coffee, mister, the bastard offspring of Mrs. Folger and Juan Valdez.
(Jess stumbles down the stairs)
Lorelai: Oh, you're very graceful.
Jess: She pushed me.
Rory: Sue me!
Jess: I could've broken my neck!
Rory: (hands him a pot) As long as it's not your arm, we need your arm.
Luke: (needing to leave so he can make further arrangements for a relative's funeral) I have to close up. Lorelai: No, you don't, you're covered. Luke: You don't have to do this! Lorelai: We don't mind, go! It'll give me a chance to number all the tables. Luke: (amused, appreciatively) Be my guest. Lorelai: Also, are they arranged like this for any particular reason? Luke: (gruffly) Don't change anything! Lorelai: It's totally not Feng Shui!
(Lorelai and Rory show up late at a town meeting)
Taylor: Late again, are we?
Lorelai: Yes, I hope I'm not pregnant.
Taylor: What?
Emily: What do you think of the Romanovs?
Luke: They probably had it coming.
Emily: A match made in heaven.
Michel: That fellow's on the phone from the restaurant.
Lorelai: Who?
Michel: The flannel man with the protruding ankles.
Lorelai: Oh, Luke?
Michel: I forgot his name from the desk to here, that's how memorable he is.
Kirk: Hello? How 'bout that coffee?
Lorelai: I got it.
Luke: Thanks.
Kirk: But, but mine's a quarter caf.
Lorelai: Huh?
Kirk: Three-fourths decaf, one-fourth caffeinated.
Lorelai: I four-fourths don't care.
Kirk: Fill it up.
(At Louie's funeral)
Luke: That ain't me, is it?
Lorelai: What are you talking about?
Luke: What Taylor said about me being like Louie, a loner, never being married and stuff. I mean, I am getting crankier as I get older, he's not so far off.
Lorelai: You are not your uncle. I mean, would Louie ever build someone a chuppah, or help fix things around someone's house without being asked, or make a special coffee cake with balloons for a girl's sixteenth birthday?
Luke: Rory told you about that?
Lorelai: Yes. And would Louie have taken in his sister's kid without hesitating and without asking for anything in return?
Luke: No one would've trusted Louie with their kid. He probably would've forgotten to feed him or something.
Lorelai: You get my point?
Luke: Yeah, I get it.
Customer: Two eggs up on toast.
Lorelai: Up, huh?
Customer: Yup.
Lorelai: Wouldn't you rather have 'em scrambled?
Customer: Nope, up's how I like 'em.
Lorelai: Come on, scrambled's better. Give it a shot. Say you want two scrambled eggs on toast, please?
Customer: Okay, young lady, two scrambled eggs on toast.
Lorelai: Adam and Eve on a raft and wreck 'em! That's real live diner talk, see? The wreck 'em is the scrambled part.
Customer: I deduced that.
Kirk: (about Luke's uncle) He kicked my dog when I was a kid.
Sy: He hit on my wife repeatedly.
Kirk: Toto was always different after that.
Sy: My wife was much affected as well.
Michel: Nine rooms for Luke from Luke's Diner?
Lorelai: That's right.
Michel: French fry convention?
Lorelai: No, just personal.
Michel: Milkshake symposium?
Lorelai: No Michel, it's something personal and I'm vouching for him.
Michel: Soda pop seminar?
Lorelai: Stop!
Michel: Pickle party?
