You need to on your tip-top game with your GTL to stay FTD to get the girls to DTF in MIA ... say that 5 times fast.

The Situation

I'm the sweetest bitch you'll ever meet, but do not f*ck with me.

Sammi

Pauly D: Yo, if she still has coloring books ... she's too young for you, man.
Vinny: If she's got a basket on her bicycle ... she's too young for you man.
Pauly D: If she still has the parental controls on her TV ... she's too young for you bro.
Vinny: If she only owns Snow White on DVD ... she's too young for you man.
Pauly D: If his Keds still light up ... he's too young for you bro.
Ronnie: [laughs]
Pauly D: If she still plays laser tag ... she's too young for you bro.
JWoww: That's me.

I just heard that you guys were mad at me, but I didn't do anything. So I'm mad at you for being mad at me for no reason.

Pauly D

Lock up your daughters. Handcuff your wives.

Mike

I like my boobs.

JWoww

Ronnie's in prime creep mode.

Sammi

Angelina rooming with me and Situation could be a good thing or a bad thing. I don't want the drama in Miami, but then again maybe there'll be a slow night, it's raining, we got no chicks — you never know what can happen.

Pauly D

I have no idea why this stripper is worrying about socks.

Situation

You brought me into this house, and Jenni has had my back since day one.

Deena

It's decorated Italy style.

Snooki

Snooki walks in the door with this Gremlin look-a-like and she says she's the new roommate.

Ronnie

Jersey Shore Quotes

Pauly D: Yo, if she still has coloring books ... she's too young for you, man.
Vinny: If she's got a basket on her bicycle ... she's too young for you man.
Pauly D: If she still has the parental controls on her TV ... she's too young for you bro.
Vinny: If she only owns Snow White on DVD ... she's too young for you man.
Pauly D: If his Keds still light up ... he's too young for you bro.
Ronnie: [laughs]
Pauly D: If she still plays laser tag ... she's too young for you bro.
JWoww: That's me.

I'm the sweetest bitch you'll ever meet, but do not f*ck with me.

Sammi