Last Man Standing
Thursdays 8:00 PM on FOXLast Man Standing Quotes
Kristen: Dad, the entire kitchen staff is freaking out, and they all have knives.
Joe: Hey where is Kyle? He comes in with you. He’s been fired, hasn’t he? It’s happening people! It’s happening already!
Mike: Alright, alright calm down nothing is happening. Kyle took a personal day off. Look, Arvo Industries can smash Ted Tacklebox all they want. They can’t smash this store. Do you understand that? I am not worried. Don’t be worried. Come on back to work.
Kirsten: Thanks, Dad. We all needed to hear that.
Mike: Yeah, I think we’re screwed.
I don't love it. But that might be because I don't like it.
Kyle
Mike: You know where he was the day I graduated?
Chuck: Jolly Jack's.
Mike: Yeah. It was balloon night.
She didn't have to do her homework inside a car outside a Jolly Jack's.
Mike
I can't believe I care more about your father then you do.
Kristin
He's at that big hookah bar in the sky.
Mike
Mandy: I've never had to interview for a job.
Kyle: Oh yeah. I always forget you're hot.
Mike: I hate this shop!
Vanessa: Wow, really? You never mentioned it.
Mike: All it attracts is potheads, just like the democratic party.
All that paper is the leading cause of deforestation.
Kyle
My god, you're exhausting.
Mike
Oh honey. I really don't think your father died to prank you.
Vanessa
I think the Egyptians had it right. When they died they were buried with all their crap.
Mike
