Group Leader: Welcome to Alien Abductee Anonymous. Everyone, find a seat.
Man #1: They looked like hot blonde chicks and they were very interested in me -- sexually.
Man #2: They beamed both me and my cow up. For the longest time, just talked to the cow. Like, I think they thought he was in charge.
Woman: They told me they would reveal the secrets of the universe to me.
Man #1: Then they probed me -- anally.
Man #2: Then they probed me. I don't think they ever probed my cow, they seemed to respect him too much.
Woman: And they probed me with incredible knowledge about the meaning of existence...and with an anal probe.
Victor: Oh, actually I'm just here to support my friend.
Stacey: It's okay Victor, it might help.
Victor: Well, my experience began when an alien ingratiated himself into the friend group. He cured my cancer by injecting me with his DNA which caused me to go berserk and try to kill my son. Luckily, my wife shot me in time. I sabotaged the alien ship and he responded by leaping into my body where I lived in a constant state of drowning. While he was in control of my body, he slept with my wife, imprisoned my son, and indirectly forced me to have sex with her. The only way I was finally rid of him was when his energy was torn from my body as I was thrown into an alternate dimension where I was forced to relive childhood abuse over and over again.
Man #1: When you say that he injected you with his DNA, you mean by anal probe right?
Victor: I was never anally probed.

Chase: Since there's a very good chance that we don't make it back from this, I wanted to tell you what I think of you. Which is that you're amazing, you're brilliant, you're strong, you're not afraid to be unpopular -- I mean you stand by your beliefs no matter what anybody else says. You're the most incredible person I've ever met.
Gert: Chase, this is really sweet, but-
Chase: I love you Gert.
Gert: What, what did you just say?
Chase: I love you and I have for a really long time. I guess I've just been too stupid and weak and insecure to tell you that before, but I just needed to say it in case I never get another chance.

Catherine: You think you got justice?
Alex: Well you're sitting in front of me in a orange jumpsuit instead of a red robe, so yeah. I'd say justice was served.

Molly: I'm gonna miss you X.
Xavin: I will see you again, I'm certain of it.

Tamar: What the hell is that?
Xavin: The Magistranian Abstract. It's recognizing the next royal heir.
Tamar: Oh yeah, of course. I should've guessed. Hey, after we're done with this whole baby situation, can y'all do me a favor and literally never come back here again?

Chase: Wait, back up! Am I the only one that remembers that we barely got out of there alive last time? And that was just against my dad, well your dad, whatever. Point is, there was one. Now there's four.
Gert: I hate to admit it, Chase is right.
Chase: You don't actually have to hate to admit that.

Karolina: No. No, Nico please don't go.
Nico: Hey, listen.
Karolina: Please don't go.
Nico: I'll come back for you, okay?
Karolina: Alright. I-I lamp you!

Nico: What is my mom doing?
Molly: Channeling 2012 Miley Cyrus?

Jonah: Oh, I know about your plan. Good thing too because I had our daughter building the platform while you were gone. Thanks for sharing your intentions by the way.
Jonah's Wife: Yes, I can see how including you greatly increased our chances of success. That's called sarcasm.
Jonah's Daughter: I really like it. It's so mean.

Chase: Gert, you're not real. I'd know that even without this weird thing happening to you because you haven't talked about the patriarchy or gender bias or microaggression once since I got here.
Gert: I need you to save me!
Chase: See? That's exactly how I know you're not real. Real Gert never needed saving.

The prophecy is the only hope my people have had for millennia. I have devoted my life to it. If she is not my great love...why is my face leaking?


Nico: What's going on?
Gert: Chase just disintegrated my phone in some kind of semi-psychotic jealous rage.
Chase: No! I found this weird feather in the phone and then, look, it just kind of like self-combusted.
Karolina: What's happening?
Nico: Um, Chase blew up Gert's phone.
Chase: Why do you immediately believe her?
Nico: Feminism.

  • Permalink: Feminism.
  • Added:

Marvel's Runaways Quotes

Geoffrey: Those friends of yours are probably feeling the exact same way you are today.
Alex: Actually, they're doing just fine.
Geoffrey: Or maybe they're better at hiding what's really going on.

Kids that know you when you're young? No one will ever know you like that again. Don't give up on that.