NCIS
Mondays 9:00 PM on CBSNCIS Quotes
Are those your house keys she just gave you?
McGee
Sloane: You’re gonna leave a complete stranger alone in your house.
Gibbs: Yes.
Sloane: I could rob you blind.
Gibbs: Lock up when you’re done.
Sloane: Ah, I can see you’re a glass half full kind of guy!
Gibbs: Depends. What’s in the glass?
Jimmy: Oh! Am I interrupting?
Gibbs: Nope. You’re right on time.
Jimmy: That’s unusual.
So, were you crooked? Or just bad at your job?
Torres
Sportelli: Ever wish you weren’t the boss, Gibbs? I thought I was getting a promotion. Instead I got everyone else’s problems.
Gibbs: Our job’s to fix ‘em.
Sportelli: Exactly. But what if we can’t?
If you listen, the dead *will* speak.
Ducky
Bishop [on a missing detective seen meeting a woman]: Is that… a booty call?!
Torres: Y’know, I could almost forgive that…
Hey, Jimmy. Did I miss ‘Bring Your Pallet to Work’ Day?
McGee
Look at that! It’s not just a pen, it’s a Frisbee!
Torres
Well, some things never change. I’m nursing a hangover, and you’re studying
Cadence Darwin [to Ducky]
Grace Confalone: Director Vance needs mandatory psych evals from each of you. I assume you would prefer sooner rather than later.
Gibbs: Uh, tell you what I’d prefer…
Grace Confalone: A root canal. I know! What say we skip our usual dance?
Gibbs: I was going to say ‘this afternoon.’
