Scrubs Season 3 Episode 19: "My Choosiest Choice of All" Quotes
Janitor: My cousin is a bank teller, and he gave me one of those exploding ink cartridges they put in stolen money so I could figure out who's been disconnecting the emergency exits!
He finds Dr. Kelso standing there, covered in blue ink.
Dr. Kelso: Nice work.
Dr. Kelso: Okay. This badge is now yours.
Janitor: I just want to thank you for believing in me. And I want to assure you that I am gonna be guarding these hospital gates the way Cerberus guarded the gates of Hell!
Dr. Kelso: Yeah, that's terrific.
Dr. Cox: Honestly, Jordan, I have never despised anyone more.
Jordan: Oh, my God. You have a crush on her.
Dr. Cox: Who said who to what now?
J.D.: Do you have to do that here?
Danni: What? I like smoking after sex.
J.D.: And during. God, you never used to smoke!
Danni: Yeah, but back then I was pretending to be someone I thought you wanted me to be, and that didn't work. So now... I'm gonna let the real me come out.
Dr Cox: I went ahead and took a look at your little rock star's chart.
Dr. Miller: Oh, didja?
Dr. Cox: Yes, I did. And his urine output is dropping, so you should probably start him on Lasix.
Dr. Miller: You amuse me. So even though he's post-op and still technically my patient, I'm gonna pretend to consider your opinion before I walk away and do whatever I want! Hmm. No!
Dr. Miller: Oh, yeah. That incision's healing up nicely.
Jeff: Thanks again, Dr. Miller. I'm gonna have my band write a song about you.
Dr. Miller: Well, I'm glad I struck a chord!
Dr. Cox: Yeah, listen: While you were proving once and for all that pretty girls do not in fact need to be funny...
Elliot: Listen, J.D... Last night was really important to me.
J.D.: I know. I mean, you don't want to be rusty at sex before you throw down with your real boyfriend, do ya?
Carla: Aww, Bambi freeze up again?
Turk: It's not our problem, honey.
Elliot: J.D., I can't talk right now.
J.D.: Should we just hold each other?
J.D.: I'm actually on my way to see somebody, so, you know...
Danni: Oh, okay. I'll see you later.
J.D.'s Narration: Oh, be nice.
J.D.: Danni, wait! How've you been?
Danni: Well, actually, I-
J.D.: Ooh! Gotta go!
J.D.: Danni!?
J.D.'s Narration: When you run into someone you used to date, either you find them totally annoying or enough time has passed that you've idealized everything about them.
Danni: Hey, J.D.
J.D.'s Narration(mocking): "Hey, Jay-Dee!"
Irv: I've been trying like the dickens to cut down on my snacking, but it's just so-
J.D.: Ehp-ehp-ehp! You look great, Irv!
J.D.'s Narration: Irv didn't look great, but I didn't have time to talk.
