South Park
Wednesdays 10:00 PM on Comedy CentralSouth Park Season 16 Quotes
So God makes it rain frogs? That just seems kind of mean to frogs, Kyle!
Cartman
Hello young man. Let me off start off by saying Sooper Foods is absolutely not an anti-Semitic company. But, if your people do have a monster creature that feeds on Easter children, we just wanted to let you know that there's a sacrifice for it in the park that is totally fun and safe to eat. Thank you.
Mr. Billings
Mr. Billings: Our entire business is based on fun and safety!
Cartman: This isn't safe or fun!
Those cryptozoologists don't know what they're talking about. They just gave me a case of the Hebrew-jeebies, that's all
Cartman
What you're looking at there is a Jewpacabra. It's like a sasquatch, only more elusive, more ferocious, and a little more greedy.
Cartman
Mr. Billings: What are the chances that Jewpacabra is real?
Peters: I'm estimating around .000000001%.
Mr. Billings: I can't afford to take that chance.
You can't scare a Jewpacabra! Don't forget Butters, we're dealing with a creature that drinks blood, hides in the night, and has no belief in the divinity of Christ.
Cartman
And so in the face of war, a little boy reminds us all what being human really means. The message is unclear, but it doesn't matter as long as you give the audience a song, celebrity bashing, and Republican presidential candidates dancing around with boobs. It's called pandering.
Newscaster
Son: What are those boys doing, Daddy?
Father: Oh, I think they're Faith Hilling, Bobby. It's a little before your time
Son: How droll.
Saying something is so 2000 and anything is so 2009, you asswipe!
Cartman
How can we be passé, we're only in 4th grade.
Kyle
There are only 3 approved memes. Peace sign, bunny ears, fake weiner.
Educational Video
