The Magicians Quotes
Penny: I know I told you you shouldn’t do it, but I will protect you, OK, somehow. I know a way to get to Jane Chatwin. She’ll help us, and you can go back to before.
Penny: You can go back and stop Julia from dying, please.
Plum: We can’t.
Penny: Why the fuck not?
Plum: Because we already did.
Fen: This definitely isn’t Fillory.
Alice: But it’s not not Fillory. It kinda smells the same way.
Margo: The opium made it. That’s a plus.
Josh: I passed a field of bacon – crispy. Is that a Fillory thing?
Alice: More of a me thing.
Josh: Well, the arm is breathable, food galore, no predators in the vicinity. Is it time? No?
Alice: If we let them out we have to tell them we’re utterly lost, no idea where are, and not a bunny in sight to get a message to our friends.
Fen: And they’ll be homesick and scared and cranky and hungry.
Margo: We’ll have to build infrastructure from scratch.
Fen: So, who wants to do the honors?
Margo: You carried the whole world in your cooch. You earned it.
Fen: Thanks for saying that, but new Fillory needs a leader, and as its literal birth mother I feel I get to say I hereby dub thee, High King Margo the Creator.
Margo: Fine, make a meal out of it. You guys know our lives about to get even weirder in some insane way we can’t possibly predict.
Josh: I find that somehow perversely comforting.
Alice: So do I, and that’s how I know it’s our story.
Zelda: This room is warded but not for long. That way a portal will take you to Brakeblls. Go. Alice, when you recover the seed…
Alice: I only have one good hand we need you. I can’t…
Zelda: There’s something master magicians know: You can never fully control external circumstances -- they may even be actively hostile -- but you can control the ones inside you. And one hand is plenty. I’ve always known you’ll get there.
Alice: But today?
Zelda: Try, OK. Just try. Go now, hurry.
Alice: Come with us.
Zelda: I can’t. I’m going to have to initiate permafrost. It’ll stop the dead from using the fountains to get to other worlds. Once I initiate, every portal will close within minutes.
Alice: We can’t just leave you here.
Zelda: For a Librarian, death isn’t the end. It is merely a transfer to another branch. Go.
Alice: Wait Zelda. Thank you, for everything.
Lipson: Here she is baby Eleanor.
Julia: I don’t remember naming her Eleanor.
Penny: That’s ‘cuz we didn’t.
Lipson: People name their kid after their doctor all the time. It’s a thing that happens.
Eliot: Charlton, in Hyman-esque form.
Charlton: Here you are in your happy place but you don’t seem happy.
Eliot: I thought being here and teaching would help, but it hasn’t. I miss them. I feel lost and alone without them. Margo, all of them. I even miss Fillory. Do you think… there’s no way Seb survived.
Charlton: Probably not. Fillory’s gone but maybe it’s better now. Maybe now he’s somewhere with someone who loves him. You’re not alone, you now, Eliot. Oh gods, I am still not used to how strong alcohol is.
Eliot: Keep drinking. It’ll come.
Alice: Why did you put it there? What if I ignored it?
Santa: But you didn’t. You needed something to get back in the game. You weren’t gonna pass on a mystery you thought your guy was working on. I’m very sorry for your loss.
Alice: It really sucks.
Santa: Well, now you know. That page and wherever that quest took you it wasn’t his story; it was yours Alice. For what it’s worth, I think he’d been really proud of you, the way you keep on fighting. I told you. I told you were good.
Alice: I still don’t know if that’s true.
Santa: Hey, this is how it works: You do your best, you fuck up, you get hurt, people die. Except for the odd microplane, jack shit gets wrapped up in a bow.
Alice: You know you’re a real ray of sunshine Santa.
Santa: Ho ho ho.
Martin: Hello big brother. Save me Rupert, I love you so. You’re still so predictable – your soft heart, your stubbornness, your stupidity.
Seb: What did you do to him?
Martin: Who, Lance? Never even met him. He must have moved on centuries ago. Spent some time in the library with my batty old writer friend Cassandra reading about the lengths you were going to to save him. You didn’t work nearly so hard to save me from Plover, did you?
Seb: Of course I did until I couldn’t. I had to save everyone from you. You chose the dark path.
Martin: Says the Dark King. Anyways, reading about you made me realize after everything you did to stop me you were going to give me everything I needed to have Fillory forever.
Penny: Come with me if you want to live.
Penny: Yeah, sorry, Josh wanted me to say it. It seemed real important to him. C’mon.
Seb: I know you’re worried, but it’s all going to be OK because of you. There’s a danger that once this door opens more dead will come through.
Eliot: This is insane.
Seb: Not if you seal it fast.
Eliot: You didn’t just bring me here to help you. You knew that I would try to stop you. Deep down, I know you want that too.
Seb: If I wanted you to stop me, I wouldn’t have cast on that door 20 minutes ago.
Josh: Sorry I was really stoned the last time I did this but time to discuss your shortcut. Margo?
Margo: Yeah there isn’t one. What do you want me to say? Somebody had to egg up and do this, and I am Margo the Destroyer.
Eliot: I didn’t name you that just so you…
Margo: Could get destroyed while destroying.
Margo: Yeah, I’m not wild about it either, but this thing’s gotta get done, so…
Eliot: We’ll all go.
Josh: Yes, we’ll all go.
Margo: Stop. If I learned one thing from Quentin – one – is sometimes you sacrifice for those you love. I’m doing this so you two can live, so don’t you dare follow me.
Julia: I think she may have just pooped.
Penny: Oh hey, I got this. I’ve been practicing. I’m ready. Hope, I like that.
Julia: I never said that. I thought it and…
Penny: Yes, I can live with Quentin as her middle name.
Julia: Good. Again, what the hell?
Lipson: Side effect. We had to attach the cord to Penny and when we did, he got better.
Julia: Wait, so you got…you’re psychic again?
Penny: Only when I’m holding her.
Julia: What else can you do while holding her?
Eliot: Charlton, you look like you.
Charlton: I also feel like me. If you touch me but also inside. It’s nice.
Eliot: Well this is weird.
Charlton: Good weird. I have an awkward question. I often ask myself what you’d say and the answer is, ‘Of course not. Don’t be stupid, Charlton. Eliot isn’t the kind of guy…
Eliot: Charlton, ask.
Charlton: I wonder whether you could ever be romantically inclined toward someone like me.
Eliot: Uh, a thousand-year-old Fillorian in a pervert ghost’s body wearing a transfiguration amulet?
Charlton: A man who knows you well, is emotionally available, and plans to stick around.
Eliot: Well shit, Charlton.
Charlton: Are we going somewhere?
Eliot: Upstairs, to explore this further.