Favorite The Office Quotes
Creed: That is "Northern Lights". Cannabis indica.
Dwight: [sighs] No, it's marijuana.
I hear Angela's party will have double fudge brownies. But it will also have Angela.
Kevin
Michael. Well, well, well, what is this contraption, I do declare?!
Oscar: It's my Blackberry, Michael. I'm trying to get updates on the company.
Michael: Who's Michael? I'm Caleb Crawdad, I do declare!
Ryan: You don't have to keep saying 'I do declare.' Every time you say something, it means you're declaring it.
Pam: Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam.
Jim: [on his cell phone] Dunder Mifflin, this is Jim!
Fool me once, strike one. Fool me twice... strike three.
Michael
Salesman is king. As the best salesman I am king of kings. Oh, you say Jesus is king of kings? Well, what does that say to you about how I think of myself.
Dwight
I don't have kids or anything, but if my grandmother ever dies I'm going to kill myself.
Andy
As you may have heard, our branch on the planet Jupiter is up 8,000 percent in sales.
Michael
Pam: What else was there?
Jim: Bottomless champagne.
Pam: Yes. We never found that bottom did we?
Normally I don't condone leaving early, but I have an appointment with the horse doctor. How that horse became a doctor, I don't know. [laughs] No, I'm kidding. He's just a regular doctor who shoots your horse in the head when its leg is broken.
Dwight
Michael: Where'd you get that information?
Oscar: Manual.
Michael: Manuel who?
Just once, I'd like to be a puppet master and have nothing go wrong. Is that too much to ask?
Dwight
