Hey, is that 10 gallons of water or are you just happy to see me?

Charmaine

Kate: Break up with Crazy Pants!
Marshall: I'm trying.

This reminds me of those church lock-ins I attended as a girl. No necking, children.

Alice

Your anger is a very pretty costume, Kate. Just like your costume is a costume.

Shoshannah

Ted: It's pretty amazing how much she's like the real Shoshannah.
Charmaine: If by amazing, you mean makes you wanna shove a stick in your mouth, then I totally agree.

You're not worried about Neil's baby, are you? Dancing won't shake that thing loose.

Shoshannah

After all these years, Tara, it's time to get out of the basement.

Shoshannah

There is a light at the end of the tunnel, Max. There is.

Tara: (about their house) How is it?
Max: When was the last time you were in New Orleans?
Tara: Okay - I am on my way.

You brought your boyfriend? I was hoping we would do this like Europeans where I wouldn't have to meet him until your funeral.

Courtney

Hey what are you doing that I am not doing? You had a huge line all day - I might as well be handing out farts.

Kate

Congratulations Char - you officially have no soul.

Neil