Favorite Wilfred Quotes
You know what I say to people when they steal my lines? I say "Hey, hey, hey, it's Faaaaaat Albert!"
Wilfred: Mexico? You know they eat dogs down there?
Ryan: They do not.
Wilfred: What, you don't think Mexico City has a Korea Town?
Ryan: Is that kitty litter?
Wilfred: There's still turds in it. Dibs!
If we make it to Victorville by sundown, I know a place that rents stilts...cheap!
Catherine
For God's sake, go participate in the most beautiful experience life has to offer even if it means looking directly into your own sister's slop hole.
Three of the bastards jumped me whilst I was in the back alley, taking the trash out of the trash.
Wilfred: Do you remember the scratch on my face, Ryan?
Ryan: The one that's still there? Yes.
Who's meowing now bitches?!?!
Ryan: Wilfred, these are pets. People will be looking for them.
Wilfred: They're cats Ryan. No one cares.
Nice job, Squishy T.
Rob
Tits, let's move.
Rob
Ryan: Maybe there will be a feel good ending, like all the cats are found safe.
Wilfred: Or sex-butchered by a psychopath.
