Cheryl: Cousin, I need your mother to take the twins for a couple of days.
Betty: Okay, why?
Cheryl: Because some evil water nymph out of an M. Night Shyamalan movie is stalking the halls of Thornhill and threatening them. Will you let Alice know or shall I?
Betty: Ummm… [Stunned silence]

Archie: What is this?
Cheryl: A ritual. For me and for all of us here. Something has been made abundantly clear: if we want our maple trees to thrive again, if we want Rivervale to have a bountiful year in all respects, a sacrifice has to be made. But, the right kind of sacrifice.
Archie: Cheryl, this is insane. I won’t let you sacrifice Betty!

Archie: Cheryl, I’m not a virgin!
Cheryl: No, you’re certainly not. But you have the distinction of being our town’s one true pure heart. We needed a king who was willing to die for his queen. Only he would be worthy.

Archie: Tonight is not about the past. But I promise you…
Cheryl: No! No more empty promises! Let the official public record show that from this moment on Thornhill and its lands shall cede from the corrupt township of Riverdale. Whatever happens tonight, you lot will have no jurisdiction over it or its blessed inhabitants.
Betty: Cheryl, come on.
Cheryl: Nay, cousin! What is decreed is decreed.

Cheryl: Poor cherub. But, I must admit I’m surprised you’d trust me with such precious cargo.
Toni: I loved you, and I felt your love. And I know the huge capacity for love your heart has, and that’s exactly what Brita needs right now.
Cheryl: Well, then I’d be honored.

Veronica: As I said, I’m hosting an exclusive by-invitation-only auction. The centerpiece of which will be some palladium doubloons I’ve acquired. Some of my guests have been asking about the palladium’s origins and I want to say that it came from your mines.
Cheryl: Not a problem! I’m always happy to let you namedrop my family in order to screw over your father.

Alice: He seems so calm.
Hermione: It’s shock, I think. He hasn’t said much since it happened.
Alice: Such a tragedy.
Penelope: I suppose, but you know what they say about playing with fire.
Hermione: What are you saying, Penelope?
Penelope: I’m just pointing out one day he can’t rub two nickels together and the next he’s driving a fancy sports car and taking you out on the town. We all know the truth: your boyfriend is a gangster. I mean, what did Jaime think when he started working with criminals?
Hermione: His name is Hiram!

Cheryl: What are you so happy about?
Penelope: Life, Cheryl. Everlasting life.

Nana Rose: The curse! The curse of our ancestors demands that all living Blossoms must die! Unless…
Cheryl: Unless?
Nana Rose: We sacrifice the interloper!
[Awkward silence]
Minerva: Oh hell no!
Cheryl: No, Min Min!
[Minerva runs out of the house]

Nice try, you simpletons! But, you’ll be shocked to learn the contract you have is totally devoid of meaning. I had Nana Rose declared legally senile half a decade ago. She has no power to do anything. Now, it’s time for you to accept the fact that you will NEVER get my precious groves. Tootles!


Cassandra: We lost … again. We totally could’ve been practicing for regionals instead of wasting our time here.
Cheryl: I couldn’t agree more, Cassandra. Could not. Agree. More.

Ms. Marble: As an outsider, it seems to me that fate has put an obstacle before you, Ms. Blossom. This Toni’s personal happiness. You must either rise above it or…
Cheryl: Throw a little chaos at it.

Madelaine Petsch Quotes

Cheryl: Ummm, did you have a lobotomy for breakfast? You’re wearing my signature color!
Toni: You don’t own the color red. Red existed before you.
Cheryl: Not at Riverdale High. Here, I invented red. I am red.
[Cheryl snaps her fingers and two girls stand behind her]
Cheryl: Sorry, but this school is not big enough for the both of us, faux-pink lady. And I was here first. Go to Centerville High or Westerberg, I don’t care. But you have until first bell Monday to clear every trace of yourself out of these halls. Copy?
[Cheryl flips her hair in Toni’s face and walks away]

Toni: Well, well, well. If it isn’t Ms. Winchester herself! You’ve come for another surprise visit, Cheryl?
Cheryl: Thank you for taking care of the River Vixens whilst I was self-isolating, but as Elton John likes to say, “The bitch is back in town!” and this squad is my birthright.