We found ourselves on the less prepared side of things when Stanley had his- when his heart went bezerk. And I knew exactly what to do but in a much more real sense I had no idea what to do. So I thought we should have a CPR training class. And... of course you can't get the practice dummy, unless the instructor comes along with it. Red Cross... racket.

Michael

Rating: 5.0 / 5.0 (1 Vote)
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Character:
Michael Scott
Episode:
The Office Season 5 Episode 13: "Stress Relief"
Show:
The Office
Related Quotes:
Michael Scott Quotes, The Office Season 5 Episode 13 Quotes, The Office Quotes
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The Office Season 5 Episode 13 Quotes

Michael: Jim: You're 6-11 and weigh 90 pounds. Gumby has a better body than you. Dwight, you're a kiss ass. Boom. Roasted. Pam, you failed art school. Boom. Roasted. Meredith, you've slept with so many guys you're starting to look like one. Boom. Roasted. Kevin, I can't decide between a fat joke and a dumb joke. Boom. Roasted. Creed, you're teeth called, your breath stinks. Boom. Roasted. Angela ... where's Angela? Whoa, there you are, I didn't see you there behind that grain of rice. Boom. Roasted. Stanley, you crush your wife during sex and your heart sucks. Boom. Roasted. Oscar, you are... [Stanley laughs] Oscar, you're gay.

Stanley you will not die! Stanley! Stanley, Barack is president! You are BLACK, Stanley!

Michael