Californication Quotes

Marcy: I think i’m sewing it up, I’m telling you seriously. It has led me astray. Karen: First of all that’s disgusting, and second of…

Hank: There’s no law against stealing from a colossal douchebag.

Charlie: I had my whole life flash before my eyes, really just like a TIVO on fast forward, and you know what? It was really fucking…

Marcy: Jesus, I love this little buddha you shot out of your vag! So wise!

Karen: (To Felicia) You say one more word to me and I will show you where Becca learned to throw down!

Charlie: Do you know how long its been since I’ve heard you say those three little words? Marcy: Eat my clam?

Charlie: I don’t mean to get a bee in my bonnet, babe, I just don’t want to see you waste your life waiting for a phone call that might…

Rick Springfield: Plus, you know, charity events are like ground zero for single pussy.

Sue: If a client asks you to dress up as a french maid and rim his shit hole, you comply, with bells on!

Hank: I’m very tight with the dean. He will not be pleased when he hears about this. Security Guard: You’re friends with the dean? Hank:…