Desperate Housewives Quotes

Parker: These are baby toys. We’re too old to play with these. Stella: Well, I’m too old to remember what the hell six-year-olds like to…

Susan: My idea of the perfect wedding keeps changing. One day I want white roses and then I want lillies .. only one thing stays constant…

Susan: You name one thing that you think is going over the top. Mike: The dove wrangler… Susan: Well the doves aren’t going to release…

Susan: I’m thinking a chocolate fountain would be a cool centerpiece to a dessert buffet. Mike: Dessert buffet? We’re having a wedding…

Minister: Are we ready? Julie: (about Susan and Mike) Are you kidding? They’ve been dragging this thing out for three years!

Mary Alice: (narrating) Family. There is nothing more important. They’re the ones who show up when we are in trouble. The ones who push…

Mike: I’m not Ian. I can’t afford to move you into a mansion, or fly you off to Paris. But I’ll be damned if I don’t give you the same…

(Gabrielle asks Carlos to come to her wedding). Carlos: I can’t go. Gabrielle: Why not? Carlos: I’m a jinx. I wen’t to your last wedding…

(Carlos looks for money to give the paperboy and discovers Edie’s pills.) Danny: What’s that? Carlos: It’s birth control pills. Danny:…

Lynette: Well, in that spirit, as soon as I start chemo, I will be giving up shampoo.