Desperate Housewives Quotes

Gabrielle: Are you hitting on me? David: What would you say if I was? Gabrielle: I’d say I’m pregnant.

Edie: (To Susan about Zach) So what’s going to happen to little creepy when he gets here?

Gabrielle: (to another inmate) Don’t judge me, you’re not in here because you were caught helping the poor.

Mary Alice: The residents of the Fairview County Jail looked forward to every Tuesday. That was the day that Gabrielle Solis came to…

Lynette: I couldn’t find Mrs. Mulberry’s umbrella, so I brought her her sun hat instead, all right? And, here we go. Parker: It’s in the…

Bree: Honey, the feelings that you’re having are perfectly normal, but George isn’t trying to take your father’s place. He’s, well, he’s…

Bree: Andrew, don’t you have a meet at the swim club? Andrew: Yeah. So? Bree: Doesn’t it require a large entrance fee? One that you can’t…

Guard: Conjugal visit rules are you got forty-five minutes. We call every fifteen minutes to make sure you’re still here. You understand?…

Andrew: Have you ever actually been with a woman? George: Excuse me? Andrew: Well, let’s be honest. I think it’s obvious by the way that…

Edie: I don’t think Mike would do that to his own son. Susan: You know? Edie: That Mike’s Zach’s real father? Yes. Julie told Karl, Karl…