The group is shocked at Erica's pregnancy reveal. She storms off and Gail follows her after insulting Phil. Carol turns down Phil's offer to run away with him, and Tandy mocks Phil for it.
Phil tries to talk to Erica but Gail blocks him. She berates Phil for having confessed his love to Carol and for treating Erica the way he has. She tells Phil that he will not be the baby's father; the whole group will be the child's father.
Tandy rants to Carol about Phil's behavior. Carol points out that Tandy should be thanking Phil, since his behavior will help Tandy win sympathy points with the group and get back in their good graces. Tandy insists he won't do that, and that he'll get their support back the "right" way.
However, the next day, he is using his bruised eye from Phil and overdramatically reacting to the pain of it in front of the group, to garner their sympathy.
Carol asks Erica about the names she's thinking of for the baby. She requests that Erica not name the baby two really outlandish sounding names and Erica agrees that it won't be a problem. Carol remarks that while she'd thought her own child (Yorba Linda) would be the first of the new population, it will calm her nerves to see Erica give birth first.
Phil enters and tries to talk to Erica. Gail tells him that he can say what he wants to say to the whole group. He asks Erica to come see something that he made for her. Gail answers for her, declining. When Phil walks off, Gail comments that Phil is almost worse than Tandy. Tandy thanks Gail for saying that and he and Carol share an excited look about his improving reception in the group.
Tandy floats around in a regular pool, sitting in a baby pool filled with margarita. He sees Phil go back into his house. He wonders what Phil has in his house. He mocks Phil from the outside of the house until he sees that Phil is sitting sadly, drinking beer among the wooden baby furniture he carved. Tandy tries to resist feeling sympathy for Phil and walks away.
Carol gives Erica a gift, a baby hat that says the baby is the first of the new world. She again comments on how she'd been making it for her own child but was now giving it to Erica's since that baby would come first. Erica becomes squeamish about the size of the baby's head that would be coming out of her as Carol explains how large the head would be.
Tandy arrives, exaggerating his bruised eye issue. Gail takes a look and tells him it looks like it's getting better. He steps away and punches himself repeatedly to worsen it and has Gail look again. She admits it looks as bad.
Phil enters the room and asks if anyone needs anything because he is going on a supply run. Nobody answers him. When he leaves, Gail comments that if Phil really wanted to make amends he'd get in the wooden stocks. Gail mentions that she actually was craving tortilla chips. Tandy mentions that he's going to get stool softener and Gail asks if he'll pick her up tortilla chips. Tandy says that he's honored that she trusts him, though Gail says that it's just tortilla chips.
Tandy and Todd go to the store to pick up the chips and stool softener. They drive around the abandoned store in a car. They discuss Phil's freakout. Tandy stresses about what type of chips Gail might want. After rejecting Todd's suggestion of getting scoops, Tandy decides to just get them all (except scoops).
Tandy apologizes for being rude to Todd and says that the stakes are high with the Gail-chips issue. Todd mentions that things are rough for him as well -- at Tandy's urging, he unloads about how he is having issues with Melissa since the bacon debacle and that she is now saying she doesn't want to have babies. Tandy reassures him that he knows Melissa wants to have babies. Todd reacts strongly to that, asking Tandy how he knows Melissa wants to have kids. Tandy tries to avoid the question but Todd forces it out of him.
Melissa is by the beach shooting at phones. Todd comes by to confront her about how Melissa was prepared to procreate with Tandy after knowing him for a very brief time. She claims that she came to her senses and decided against having kids. He yells at her for having kept the secret from him. When she tells that he kept something from her as well (living a double life in a bacon house), he flips out and says what she did was much worse. They both agree that they cannot trust one another.
Tandy delivers the chips to Gail. She asks whether he has scoops. He doesn't. She thanks him anyway, taking a bag, and he profusely thanks her as well.
Tandy spots Phil throwing away the wooden furniture he made. He tries to resist feeling sorry for Phil but finally gives in and approaches him. Tandy tells a very drunk Phil that what will help will be getting in the stocks and serving out his punishment. Phil tells Tandy that he doesn't believe him at all and claims Tandy would love nothing more than to see him in the stocks. Phil tells Tandy that his one regret is that he saved Tandy from the roof rather than letting him die. Tandy insists that Phil doesn't mean that, but Phil insists he does, saying that everyone's life got worse when Tandy entered the picture.
Tandy converses with his group of ball friends. He compares the situation with Phil to the movie "When a Man Loves a Woman," but he totally botches the plot when he explains it to the balls. He says that Phil is Meg Ryan and he needs to be Phil's Andy Garcia.
Carol delivers Erica more first child of the new world babywear. Carol pushes for information on how long Erica and Phil were trying to conceive. Erica says they were not trying at all and Carol mentions that she and Tandy have been trying for six months. Erica expresses surprise, but off of Carol's panic she tries to reassure Carol that six months of trying with no results is normal.
Carol goes to the supermarket and gathers up all of the pregnancy and fertility tests.
Gail lies in bed with her Gordon dummy, caressing it.
Erica looks at the baby gear that she got from Carol.
Todd settles in to sleep on the couch.
Melissa reads a book in bed and looks sadly at the empty space where Todd would normally be.
Carol takes pregnancy tests outside in the dark and looks at them, anxiously.
Tandy goes to find Phil in his house. He finds the house empty, save a ton of empty beer and liquor bottles. He goes to wake Todd to ask where Phil is. Todd tells Tandy that Phil is down by the beach and that he's a real mess. Tandy spots Phil down, lying prone and unconscious at the edge of the shore, and runs down to him. He tries to wake Phil up to no avail.
Tandy retrieves Phil, sliding him back up to shore on a surf board. He gives Phil a long impassioned speech of apology, and how he (Tandy) has changed as a person, and how Tandy has admired Phil all along.
Tandy returns to bed with Carol, telling her that he was out helping Phil. Carol admits that she is still not pregnant and Tandy reassures her. They hear Phil shouting Tandy's name. Tandy remarks that he is probably just calling to thank him. We see that Tandy has left Phil restrained in the stockade.