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Jersey Shore Review: "GTF (Gym, Tan, Find Out Who Sammi Is Texting)"

by at . Comments

Last night's Jersey Shore, while possessing the most ridiculous title in the show's brief history, was actually fairly run-of-the-mill. But that doesn't mean it wasn't fun.

Relatively free of physical altercations and TMI references to bodily functions, "GTF (Gym, Tan, Find Out Who Sammi Is Texting)" centered around ... see episode title.

Was Sam being shady, doggin' Ron with some dude named Arvin? Ultimately, she and Ron decided to give things another shot, and put Guido MacGyver in his place.

S-S-S-Sammi

In addition to Sammi's shady texts, JWoww gets upset when she notices Roger acting suspicious, but later realizes her man wasn't being as dastardly as she suspected.

She'll have to eat crow over that, which sounds a lot less appealing than the feast at Vinny's family's house on Staten Island, where he made a road trip with Pauly D.

Any episode with an Uncle Nino sighting is worth watching.

Vinny decides, amid constant abuse, that he will get a tan. Because you don't want to go through life with moderately fair skin. It's like the Scarlett Letter on the Shore.

As for Snooki? She was just being Snooki. For better or worse. She's always good for some absurd one-liners, and always really annoying. It is what it is at this stage.

Not the most dramatic episode ever, but that's not a bad thing. That's just how the Shore goes. Now, follow the jump for some of the episode's top Jersey Shore quotes ...

Pauly D: I love Vinny's family, they're like my family ... old-school Italian, looks like a Guido Circus. | permalink
Vinny's Cousin: [to Pauly] What is with that haircut man? Bride of Frankenstein ain't got nothin' on you! | permalink
Snooki: Whoever I have babies with has to be Italian. I want my kids last name to have a vowel on it... and be tanned, obviously. | permalink
Snooki: I look like a pale freak. I feel like Vinny. | permalink
Pauly: GTF! Gym, Tan, Find Out Who Sammi Is Texting Behind Ronnie's Back. | permalink
Pauly: [mocking Vin] Don't touch me, I'm tanned! | permalink
JWoww: I think Sam's doggin' Ron ... until we get the facts straight, it looks pretty bad on Sam's part. | permalink
Mike: I run into my boy, Arvin ... he looks like a jacked-up-guido-MacGyver! | permalink
Mike: When Ron is crying on my shoulder, good old Sammi, the sweetest b!tch you'll ever met, is callin' another dude. Sammi, you got caught you sneaky b!tch! | permalink
Ronnie: Your hand was in the f*%kin' cookie jar, how are you gonna sit there with the crumbs on your lip and be like, I didn't eat the cookie! | permalink
Pauly: If Ron and Sam's relationship continues I'll kill myself ... there will be no more DJ, I'll kill myself. | permalink

Review

Editor Rating: 2.5 / 5.0
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User Rating:

Rating: 3.8 / 5.0 (11 Votes)

Steve Marsi is the Managing Editor of TV Fanatic. Follow him on Google+ or email him here.

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Wow. No mention of Ron cornering Sammi at the end of the episode? It bothers me how none of the others in the houses stepped in to help Sam.
And the "shady" texts from Sam were sent when she left the Jersey Shore house. Ron and Sam were not together. There's nothing shady about texting a friend.

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I don't see why ronnie pissed over sammy texting , they are not together anywats

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Everyone secretly hates Mike, I hate Ronnie and cant forgive him for how he treated Sammi and shes an idiot if she will take him back, and i think it hilarious that Ronnie feels he has the right to be angry at Sammi for texting another guy when they were broken up while Ronnie cheated on her like a million times last season. Love the new Sammi she was a little lost in the begning of S3 but she seems to have found her feet, hopefully she will stay like that.

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The dog poop in the first 10 minutes was seriously OFF! This episode heavily focuses on the relationship with Sam and Ron (It's been rough a last few weeks since we seen these 2) and the jealousy and SNITCHuation Mike. Mike is really annoying, no wonder everyone in the house hates him. Such a baby, like mind your own business you shady b***h LOL. Anyway, I like the new Sam its just that I don't like seeing her with Ron. The fights are the same thing over and over. BTW, it would be nice seeing Pauly D and Vinnys reaction to the dog poop in their room.