Sundays 9:00 PM on FOX
Family-guy

Diane Simmons is one half of the Quahog 5 News team on Family Guy.  Diane is voiced by Lori Alan and can frequently be seen bickering with her co-anchor Tom Tucker with hilarious results.

Diane Simmons Quotes

Good evening, tonight's top story, Quahog is infested. With loud hairy creatures also known as New Yorkers

Diane

Diane: A tragic accident today in the north Providence area, a family of four lost their lives when their mini van swerved off the road and into a ravine, exploding on impact.
[Tom laughs]
Diane: Do you find this funny Tom?
Tom: Oh, no, no, no, no, no, I was remembering I accidentally put my shirt on inside out this morning. It's fine now though. So what were you saying about a.... fashion show?

Family Guy Quotes

Stewie: (Comes into the bedroom) Lois! Lois! Lois! Lois! Lois! Lois! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Mama! Mama! Mama! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Mum! Mum! Mum! Mum! Mummy! Mummy! Mumma! Mumma! Mumma!
Lois: What!?
Stewie: Hi! (Giggling and running out of the room)

Hi, I'm Wilford Brimley and I have diabetes. It hurts me to pee and it causes me to be short with my family. I can't sleep at night. The other day I stubbed my toe and took it out on the dog. And two weeks ago I ran out of vanilla ice cream and struck my wife. Then I find out my wife has been dead for six years. Who the hell did I hit?

Wilford Brimley
x Close Ad