Principal W. Seymour Skinner is the principal of Springfield elementary on The Simpsons.  Seymour was actually born Armin Tamazarian but swapped places with his seargeant when he returned from Vietnam war.  Now he lives with his mother and has an on and off again relationship with Edna Krabappel.  His greatest nemesis is either Bart or Superintendent Chalmers, you decide.

Principal Skinner Quotes

Bart Simpson, that is a rebuilt Yugoslavian engine and there's not even a Yugoslavia anymore. Bring it back at once.

Skinner

Lisa Simpson in detention? My horoscope told me I'd see something interesting today, but I thought that'd be the horoscope itself

Principal Skinner

The Simpsons Quotes

Horst: (Sinister) Okay, Mr. Burns, you win. But beware. We Germans aren't all smiles and sunshine.
Mr. Burns: (Sarcastic) Oooh, the Germans are mad at me. I'm so scared! Oooh, the Germans! (Hiding behind Smithers) Uh oh, the Germans are going to get me!
Horst: Stop it!
Man: Stop, sir.
Mr. Burns: Don't let the Germans come after me. Oh no, the Germans are coming after me.
Man: Please stop the "pretending you are scared" game, please.
Horst: Stop it! Stop it!
Mr. Burns: (Pause) No! They're so big and strong!
Man: Stop it.
Horst: Stop it, Mr. Burns.
Man: Please stop pretending you are scared of us, please, now.
Mr. Burns: Oh, protect me from the Germans! The Germans--
Horst: Burns, Stop it!

(Squishing an ice cream to his forehead) I'm a unitard!

Ralph