When Alan moves in with Lindsey the results are not what he expected on Two and a Half Men. "Mr. Hose Says Yes" is the 21st episode of the show's 9th season
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Two and a Half Men Season 9 Episode 21 Quotes

My point being, fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, I want a fully-funded 401K and a Camaro.

Berta

You know, once upon a time, a cute little boy came to live came to live in this house for a few days, maybe you've met him, and he is the pot-soaked, masturbating, couch-eating potato who eats all your cookies.

Berta