Tony: One other question, I know you're an expert in English history. And I was just wondering, have you ever heard of Archibald Drummond, the 17th Earl of Trent?
Ducky: The Earl of Trent. No, I can't say I have. Why?
Tony: I was just wondering. Thanks.

Tony: You know the "Men" in "Men's Room" is more of a rule than a suggestion, probie.
Bishop: Look, you two always get to go off giggling to the urinal together and I always get left out. So we're going to talk and we're going to do it here.

I bet she's a panther in the sack!

Tony: You know, I've been thinking about getting a dog.
Gibbs: He's not a dog. He's a Marine.

Ziva: For my sanity, can you not call me Probie?
Tony: But I say it with love.

Ziva: When I have a man, the favors I offer have little to do with clothes.
Tony: That's good to know.

Ziva: You know I keep thinking if it was not for Orly, things would have been different. I would be a different person.
Tony: Then I should I catch her before she leaves. You know. I'd thank her.

Who's the new face of NCIS? You're lookin' at it, McEnvy.

If I could drag her back I would, in a heartbeat. But it's no use. Ziva David is dead.

Liz Allen: I think my husband's having an affair.
Tony: Unbelievable. A guy'd have to be nuts to cheat on a dame like you.

Gibbs: The plane's missing.
Tony: It's been Kai-jacked!
Ziva: Did you really just say that?
Tony: I regret it already.

I think we've found the entire cast of Hee Haw.

NCIS Quotes

Tony: One other question, I know you're an expert in English history. And I was just wondering, have you ever heard of Archibald Drummond, the 17th Earl of Trent?
Ducky: The Earl of Trent. No, I can't say I have. Why?
Tony: I was just wondering. Thanks.

[reading Valentine's Day card] Roses are red; they go in a bucket; Jake is a jerk; he can go suck it.

Bishop