Popular Anthony (Tony) DiNozzo Quotes
Tony: One other question, I know you're an expert in English history. And I was just wondering, have you ever heard of Archibald Drummond, the 17th Earl of Trent?
Ducky: The Earl of Trent. No, I can't say I have. Why?
Tony: I was just wondering. Thanks.
Tony: Special Agent Fornell! Look at that. Your hair grew back, almost.
Fornell: You see, this is why you're my least favorite, DiNozzo. [Glances at McGee] Scratch that. Second least favorite.
This was no boating accident.
Tony: Are they arguing in binary?
Bishop: Binary averages twelve digits per word. It's some sort of modified shorthand.
Tony: He can't even argue like a cool cyborg.
Spoiler alert, Heisenberg. It doesn't end well for you.
Tony: So help me, McBlivious, if you don't pounce on that hot Israeli action I will never forgive you.
McGee: Gabby's a spy, Tony. Flirting's just another weapon in her arsenal.
Tony: And what an arsenal, huh? That wasn't just flirting, Tim. That was....flirting. For whatever reason, she's caught the mc-fever and you're the only cure.
Fornell: All right, this is too pathetic. Grab your stuff, let's go.
Tony: Go where?
Fornell: My house.
Tony: You're inviting me to your house for Thanksgiving dinner? I thought I was your second-least favorite?
Fornell: You are. But dry turkey, blackened dinner rolls....it's really more of a punishment.
Tony: So now that we're friends, can I call you Toby?
Fornell: Don't push your luck.
Tony: So the illegal sports book was yours then?
Carver: No idea what you mean. But I'd love to know who exactly you heard it from.
Tony: Well I bet you would, but then, I have a feeling that the same thing would happen to him that happened to the last guy who pissed you off? So....
Delilah: With this case, he thinks I'm trying to lose my job but I'm not. It's the opposite. I'm trying to show that I can do more, to move up.
Tony: I can understand that.
Delilah: Because there's this senior analyst opening in Dubai.
Tony: Dubai is not here.
Delilah: I know. Which leads me to another thing that I need to tell Tim.
Bishop: When my grandma died, it helped me just to talk about her. Maybe you guys could tell me what Jackson was like.
Abby: He gave the best hugs.
McGee: He was the only one that could the Gibbs stare at Gibbs.
Tony: With those icy blue eyes. He gave me the sweater off his back once. White. Two functional pockets. Very soft.
McGee: Where are you going?
Tony: I'm done taking orders. Are you coming?
Tony: [points to casket] Hop in.
McGee: Why would I do that?
Tony: We take a picture, pretend that you're dead, and you don't have to retake the polygraph!
McGee: Tony that is not funny.
Tony: They already think you're ducking them. It's only going to get worse.