Favorite April Ludgate Quotes
Time is money, money is power, power is pizza, and pizza is knowledge, let’s go!
"I guess I kind of hate most things. But I never really seem to hate you. So I want to spend the rest of my life with you, is that cool?"
Horizons are dumb, never broaden your horizons.
Chris: I want to apologize to all the women and Jerry. If I could go back in time and cut your eyeballs out, I would.
April: Wow, that is so sweet.
Chris: Thank you.
I wished for his happiness to go away. I might be a wizard.
Andy: God, I swear.. it's almost like they don't want you to win.
April: Well, you better practice. You gotta win me a teddy bear.
Andy: I'm gonna win you a million teddy bears.
April: Well, I want a billion teddy bears.
Andy: Well, that's a little unrealistic. This is a hard game.. Two million.
To be perfectly honest, Mouserat's music is not my thing. I really only listen to like German death reggae, Halloween sound effects from the 1950s, and Bette Midler. Obviously.
We have a thousand dollars in our bank account and we're young and irresponsible.
I gave my gay boyfriend's boyfriend a hickey and it totally made my gay boyfriend jealous.
April: I used to play softball.
Andy: I used to play baseball! It's like the boy version of softball.
Andy: I have no idea how to run a nonprofit.
April: Hey, you shined shoes for two years and never earned a profit.
Andy: It's so much more beautiful than I ever could have imagined.
April: Yeah, I'm trying to find a way to be annoyed at it, but I'm coming up empty.
