Artie: Have you just not found the right... person?
Beiste: Guy. I like guys.

• Permalink: Have you just not found the right... person? Guy. I like guys.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Sugar asked me out on a date. She invited me to go horseback riding. I'm just hoping it doesn't involve being towed.

• Permalink: Sugar asked me out on a date. She invited me to go horseback rid...
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Artie: I wanna be very clear: I still have the use of my penis.

• Permalink: I still have the use of my penis.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

We're planning on smacking them down like the hand of God.

• Permalink: We're planning on smacking them down like the hand of God.
• Rating: 4.9 / 5.0

Artie: I'm kind of getting cold feet.
Brittany: Can you even feel your feet?

• Permalink: I'm kind of getting cold feet. Can you even feel your feet?
• Rating: 4.8 / 5.0

You're irritating. But don't take that personally.

• Permalink: You're irritating. But don't take that personally.
• Rating: 4.8 / 5.0

I sound like someone put tap shoes on a horse and shot it.

• Permalink: I sound like someone put tap shoes on a horse and shot it.
• Rating: 4.8 / 5.0

Every day, Tina and Mike's Asian fusion grows stronger.

• Permalink: Every day, Tina and Mike's Asian fusion grows stronger.
• Rating: 4.8 / 5.0

You had me at sex tape. How can I help?

• Permalink: You had me at sex tape. How can I help?
• Rating: 4.7 / 5.0

Where is Rachel? She never misses applause.

• Permalink: Where is Rachel? She never misses applause.
• Rating: 4.7 / 5.0

Will: When I'm sick there's only one thing that makes me feel good.
Artie: Gin and juice...

• Permalink: When I'm sick there's only one thing that makes me feel good. ...
• Rating: 4.6 / 5.0

Sam: Everything Bieber does is epic.
Artie: Truth.

• Permalink: Everything Bieber does is epic. Truth.
• Rating: 4.2 / 5.0