$5,000 for a couple dolls. Are you out of your mind?

Bernadette: Well, what if Hulk picked up Thor while Thor is holding the hammer.
Amy: Yeah?
Bernadette: Then by the transitive property of picking things up Hulk picked up the hammer.
Amy: No. Hulk picked up Thor. Thor picked up the hammer.
Penny: Okay, hang on. If I go to a bar and pick up a guy and he picks up a girl and then we all leave together. Did I pick up the girl?
Amy: Did that ever happen?
Penny: Hey, are we talking about me or are we talking about Thor?

Bernadette: Why are they staring?
Amy: Who cares? Just soak it in. Hello, Boys.

Amy: When did Howard learn to sew?
Bernadette: When he was a little boy, every couple months, he'd have to let his mother's pants out.

Raj: I bought her a couple drinks and she gave me her email address.
Bernadette: "jennifer@notevenifyourethelastguyonearth.loser"

Howard: You see, I have to play Dungeons and Dragons ... for the marriage.
Bernadette: You're an idiot.
Howard: I'm your idiot.

Bernadette: Because I'm the one that had it towed.
Amy: You?
Bernadette: Didn't see that one coming, did ya?

Bernadette: Gosh, Amy. I'm sensing a little hostility. Is it maybe because like Sheldon's work, your sex life is also theoretical?
Penny: Damn.
Amy: Well, at least, when we do make love, Sheldon won't be thinking about his mother.

Amy: Well, Howard's never gonna go to space again, but Sheldon will always be a genius.
Bernadette: You're right. And, I'm sure Sheldon will get a fancy parking spot again if and when he makes a worthwhile contribution to science.
Amy: If and when?

Howard: So, this one's on God.
Bernadette: That might be a little more convincing if you didn't have a mouth full of bacon cheeseburger.
Howard: My religion's kinda loosey-goosy. Basically, as long as you have your schmekel clipped and don't wear a cross, you're good.

Amy: I feel like I'm in high school again.
Bernadette: Yeah, doing the prom queen's homework, so she'll like us.
Amy: I know. It's finally working.

Howard: Two weeks ago I was an astronaut.
Bernadette: Yeah, well, now you're a Smurf. Keep walking.

TBBT Quotes

Amy, I excel at many things, but getting over you wasn't one of them.


(Singing) Thor and Dr Jones, Thor and Dr. Jones. One plays with lightening, the other plays with bones.

Howard and Raj