Popular Bree Hodge Quotes
Bree: He could've been a sexual predator.
Rex: And he ended up at Mrs. Fromme's? That's a lose-lose situation.
Bree: Rex. That's not the point. The point is, I don't feel safe. And I was wondering if you could spend the night.
Rex: You're in the NRA. You own like, four guns. If someone broke in, I'd expect you to protect me
Lynette: You can tell them how beautifully behaved the twins are.
Bree: So you want me to lie?
Lynette: I thought that was understood
Bree: Is that how you see me? As some sort of prude who just lays there like a cold fish? I love sex.
Dr. Goldfine: All right.
Bree: I love everything about it. The sensations, the smells. I especially love the feel of a man. All that muscle and sinew pressed against my body. And then, when you add friction. Mmm ... The tactile sensation of running my tongue over a man's nipple ever so gently. And then there's the act itself - two bodies becoming one in that final eruption of pleasure. To be honest, the only thing I don't like about sex is the scrotum. I mean, obviously it has its practical applications, but I'm just not a fan
Bree: It's just not right.
Rex: What?
Bree: A woman is in a coma, because of Andrew. And there he is, happy as a clam!
Rex: Well, we grounded him, we took away the TV in his room. How many more ways do you want to punish him
Bree: Well I know that good help is hard to find but stealing a family's nanny is so unseemly!
Lynette: I'm not twisting anyone's arm. If I make a better offer, than why shouldn't a qualified person weave the benefits. So come on. Where can I score some high-grade nanny?
Bree: Well, that's because you just don't love him as much as I do!
Rex: Well, isn't that nice.
Bree: It's just a fact. I'm his mother. He lived inside of me.
Rex: He hung out in your womb for a few months back in the 80s. Since then, I have grown to love him just as much as you!
Bree: Hi Danielle. How was school?
Danielle: It was ok.
Bree: Good. Where does Andrew keep his marijuana?
Bree: Were you with a woman? Did you tell her that you have a wife or does that hinder your pick-up style?
Rex: All right. Even if I was seeing someone, I have every right to. Exploring options is the whole point of being separated!
Bree: Options?! I'm not a mutual fund, Rex
Maisy: You're not going to tell a soul. Bree, you may hate me, but you'd hate the humiliation a lot more.
Bree: Oh, I don't hate you, Maisy. I pity you
Bree: As of this moment, Rex, I am no longer your wife. I am going to go out, and find the most vindictive lawyer I can find, and together, we are going to eviscerate you. I'm going to take away your money, your family, and your dignity. Do you hear me?
Rex: Bree...
Bree: And I am so thrilled to know that you still love me. Because I want what's about to happen to you...to hurt as much as humanly possible. I'm so glad you didn't die before I got a chance to tell you that
Maisy: Oh, Bree. What a nice surprise. Would you like to come in?
Bree: Well, that depends. Are you having an affair with my husband?
Rex: Are we gonna talk about what I said?
Bree: If you think I'm gonna discuss the dissolution of my marriage in a place where the restrooms are labeled "Chicks" and "Dudes", you are out of your mind
