Popular Carlos Solis Quotes
Gabrielle: You see, your health insurance sent us a letter because someone ordered a year's worth of birth control pills, and apparently our policy doesn't cover drugs bought by the kilo.
Carlos: I told you, it was mama.
Gabrielle: The prescription was dated, Carlos, and Juanita was in a coma when this claim was filed. You did this, not your mother. At least be man enough to own up to it. She would've been
Carlos: What about the baby, Gabrielle, huh? What about my baby?
Gabrielle: Oh, your baby?
Carlos: Fine. Our baby. Hey, we're a family now. This baby needs its mother and its father.
Gabrielle: Oh, Carlos. Whoever said you were the father?
Carlos: Gaby, thank God you're doing this. Beating up a second gay guy? It looks bad.
Gabrielle: Yes. Well, Carlos, in some circles, beating people up at all is frowned upon.
Carlos: So why'd you change your mind?
Gabrielle: Well, I'm about to be the mother of your child, which means a lot of responsibility and little time for myself. So if I'm gonna get you out of this mess, you have to reciprocate.
Carlos: Okay.
Gabrielle: When the baby cries in the middle of the night, you're gonna get up without saying one word. Doctors' appointments: you're driving. I'm not putting a car seat in my Maserati. And you will also be on bottle duty. That means washing, sterilizing, and filling. That way I'll have some semblance of a life, and then maybe I won't hate you so much
Carlos: You've got some admirers out there.
Lynette: Oh?
Carlos: Yeah, as you walked by, I heard one of them say, "check out the rack on that one."
Lynette: Aw... Can I do the honors and call security?
Gabrielle: Hey, cut her some slack. She's Romanian, okay? When your people are being chased into Argentina by angry cossacks, maybe a sparkling toilet isn't that important.
Carlos: Argentina? How about you stick to fractions, and I'll teach Juanita geography? Goodbye.
Carlos: Damn it!
Gabrielle: Whatever it is, I can explain.
Gabrielle: I don't understand. How could you not know you're Mexican? We eat Mexican food all the time!
Juanita: We eat Chinese food, too. Does that mean I'm Chinese?
Carlos: No, that just means your mother hates to cook.
Gabrielle: You know how Ana is dating Danny Bolen?
Carlos: I'm gonna kill him.
Gabrielle: And we have to be realistic.
Carlos: With my bare hands...
Gabrielle: Because they're not gonna listen to reason.
Carlos: And bury him under the porch.
Gabrielle: No, Carlos. What choice do we have? They're two teenagers who are getting seriously involved. Isn't it better to be safe than sorry?
Carlos: But giving them these is like giving them our blessing.
Gabrielle: And that's how I felt at first, but like Angie said, nature's gonna take its course.
Carlos: Yeah, easy for her to say. She's got the boy!
Gabrielle: No, Carlos. What choice do we have? They're two teenagers who are getting seriously involved. Isn't it better to be safe than sorry?
Carlos: But giving them these is like giving them our blessing.
Gabrielle: And that's how I felt at first, but like Angie said, nature's gonna take its course.
Carlos: Yeah, easy for her to say. She's got the boy!
Gabrielle: No, okay. That was a stretch. I'm sorry. Carlos, wait! Come back. Look, I wanna start over. We're gonna have a baby. Isn't that what you always wanted? Carlos, wait! I said I was sorry and I love you! What more do you want?"
Carlos: I want a paternity test.
Carlos: You knew the one thing that I demanded was fidelity, and you still went out and screwed around behind my back.
Gabrielle: You knew the one thing I didn't want was a child, and you still tricked me into getting pregnant!
Carlos: It's not the same thing.
Gabrielle: Damn straight, what you did was worse!
Carlos: At the Donahue party everyone was talking mutual funds, and you found a way to mention you slept with half of the Yankee outfield.
Gabrielle: I'm telling you, it came up in the context of the conversation
