Chandler Bing Quotes
Monica: Chandler, nobody likes breaking up with someone. You just gotta do it.
Chandler: I know. But it's just so hard, you know. I mean, you're sitting there with her. She has no idea what's happening. Then, you finally get up the courage to do it. There's that awkward moment when you've handed her the note. You try to run out of the restaurant before she's actually finished the note.
Joey: Why do you have to break up with her? Be a man. Just stop calling.
(To Ross) You may want to rethink the dirty underwear. I mean, this is basically the first time she's going to see your underwear, do you really want it to be dirty?
Phoebe: Wait here. Breathe.
(Phoebe goes over to speak to Janice. She talks to her for a few seconds, and then Janice immediately smiles, hugs her, waves to Chandler, and leaves.)
Chandler: How do you do that?
Phoebe: It's like a gift.
Chandler: We should always always break up together.
Phoebe: Oh, I'd like that.
Ross: Peach pit!
Chandler: Yes, honey?
Ross: That night we had...
Chandler: Peaches?
Ross: No, actually, nectarines.
It's kind of an emergency! I guess you know that, or we'd be in the predicament room.
Ross: Chandler, what about you?
Chandler: If I were omnipotent for a day, I'd make myself omnipotent forever.
Rachel: See, there's always one guy. (Mocking Chandler) If I had a wish, I'd wish for three more wishes.
(To Receptionist) Excuse me, look, we've been here for over an hour, and a lot of people less sick than my friend have gone in. I mean that guy with the toe thing. Who's he sleeping with?
Ross: I remember the moonlight coming through the window, and her face had the most incredible glow.
Chandler: Yes, the moon, the glow, the magical feeling, you did this part. Could I get some painkillers over here, please?
Joey: Man. Can you believe he's only had sex with one woman?
Chandler: I think it's great. You know, it's sweet. It's romantic.
Joey: Really?
Chandler: No, you kidding? The guy is a freak.
Ross: Uh oh.
Chandler: What? There was ice there that night with Carol? Plastic seats? Four thousand angry Pittsburgh fans?
Ross: No, actually, I was just saying it looks like we're not sitting together. But now that you mention it, there was ice that night. It was the first frost.
Joey: (Walking into Central Perk) 95, 96, 97. See, I told you! Less than 100 steps from our place to here.
Chandler: You've got way too much free time.
Joey: Don't you have any respect for your body?
Ross: Don't you realize what you're doing to yourself?
Chandler: I've had it with you guys and your cancer, your emphysema and your heart disease. The bottom line is, smoking is cool, and you know it.
