Herb: My marriage isnt over yet
Chris: Duuudee....you've been takin out the garbage for two and a half hours

Alan: How's the pediatrician game?
Herb: Like taking money from babies.

Two and a Half Men Quotes

Charlie: Oh, try MalibuPuddingGirls.com.
Alan: Pudding Girls?
Charlie: Trust me.
Alan: Oh ... ew.

Alan: What's the forecast?
Charlie: High tonight, low tomorrow, 100% chance of hangover.