Herbert Quotes
Season 11, Episode 12: "Valentine's Day in Quahog"
Herbert: If I gave you a sandwich, could you get Chris to fart on it?
• Rating: 3.7 / 5.0
Herbert: Oh, hey there Chris! Happy Valentine's Day! Hope Cupid brings you a saggy old bag of treats!
• Rating: Unrated
Season 10, Episode 21: "Tea Peter"
Carter: The government wants to tell you how many children you can have!
Herbert: What? No!
• Rating: Unrated
Season 9, Episode 19: "Episode VI: It's a Trap"
Chris: A sister! Who is it?
Herbert: Who do you think it is? Who's the only goddamn woman in the galaxy?
Chris: Leia...
• Rating: 1.0 / 5.0
Season 9, Episode 11: "German Guy"
Herbert: You know Chris, all my life, I've wanted to see you locked in a basement. But now that it's happened, all I want to do is get you out!
• Rating: 4.0 / 5.0
Season 9, Episode 1: "And Then There Were Fewer"
Herbert: Look. Everyone but Chris, keep your pants on and we'll find a way out of this.
• Rating: 4.8 / 5.0
Season 8, Episode 11: "Dial Meg for Murder"
Mort: What kind of birdhouse can you build with popsicles, roofies, and a rubber mallet?
Herbert: It's for a rare African bird called "none your business."
• Rating: 4.8 / 5.0
Season 6, Episode 10: "Play It Again, Brian"
Herbert: Alright children, your mammy and pappy asked me to look after ya for the next couple days. So I wanna lay down a few ground rules: no cussing, clean your plates, and only a half-hour of radio and then its off to bed.
Chris: Well that sucks.
Herbert: And don't you mouth off to me or I'm gonna slap you right in your penis
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Meg: No offense, Mr. Herbert, but I'm a seventeen year old girl, and I have no need for you.
Herbert: Well, no offense to you Meg, but you're a seventeen year old girl, and I have no need for YOU.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
Season 6, Episode 2: "Movin' Out (Brian's Song)"
Herbert: Well OshKosh B'gosh, it's a brand new paperboy. That's a mighty full sack you're carrying.
Stewie: Piss off you perverted old freak.
Herbert: Oh, we got a fighter.
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0
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Total Quotes: 21