Hermes Quotes
Hermes: And as a further cost-cutting measure, I have eliminated the salt-water cooler.
Zoidberg: This is a witch hunt!
Mon, I'm hungrier than a green snake in a sugar cane field!
Farnsworth: Good news, everyone. Tomorrow you'll be making a delivery to Ebola 9, the virus planet.
Hermes: Why can't they go today?
Farnsworth: Because tonight's a special night and I want all of you to be alive.
Hermes: Bender, man. It has come to my attention that this company has been paying you to do nothing but loaf about on the couch.
Bender: You call that a couch? I demand a pillow!
Now, look here, Bender. I respect your diversity to the extent the law requires but you used up all your days off when you had that bout with Roberculosis.
Leela: Thank you all for the inspiring advice, but I'm perfectly happy with my life the way it is.
Bender: That sounds like a cry for help.
Amy: Let's all take her out tonight. There's lots of great places to meet people.
Hermes: The Federal Sex Bureau.
Bender: A saucy puppet show.
Zoidberg: The rotting carcass of a whale.
Amy: Hmm, I'll pick!
Amy: Do you think Calculon's evil twin will ever walk again?
Hermes: I don't know, Amy. I just don't know.
Hermes: Fry, mon, if you're going to be living in the office you could at least be on time for work.
Fry: I'm sorry. I was up really late poking through people's desks.
As this shocking graph indicates, our water consumption has tripled in the last month. I notice Fry has been here for a month, so I'm appointing him head of a committee to find who's responsible.
Hermes: OK, Captain, this is just a standard legal release protecting Planet Express from lawsuits in the event of the unforeseen.
Leela (reading): Death by airlock failure.
Hermes: Mm.
Leela: Death by brain parasite.
Hermes: Yeah.
Leela: Death by sonic diarrhoea?
Hermes: Oh, you don't want that!
Leela: Look, I don't know about any of your previous captains but I intend to do as little dying as possible.
Hermes: Sign the paper.
