TV Fanatic Works Better with Prime Instant Video
40,000 other titles are available to watch now.

Jane: Penny's happy so as her friend you should-
Max: - Probably be trying to break her and Pete up? Yeah I just don't know if that seems like me.

I'm seeing you in a whole new light too. The kind of light they use when you try on a bathing suit. Which is a very unflattering light sir. Not good!

So you and the guys wanna go check out some porno? Get some eyes on some thighs? Some peepers on some creepers? Some rods and cones on some bras and thongs?

Max: If that season had aired, I would've been the first openly gay person on television.
Jane: Except for Ellen, Rosie, all the career high guys.
Penny: Oh and Norman Korpi from the Real World season one.
Max: Deep cut.

Dave: You guys wouldn't understand, neither of your ancestors were at the first Thanksgiving
Jane: Ok, neither were the Navajo.
Dave: One of our many snubs.

Look at that man move. This is some good material for the buzz-bank.

You know I always thought I'd marry a Jewish guy, until I met this chocolate anaconda.

Jane: So Max is a Bar Mitzvah MC now...
Penny: I think they prefer to be called Bart Mitzvah hype guys.

Oh my Kaiser Soze!

Jane: You create your own destiny, like Katniss Everdeen in The Hunger Games.
Penny: Oh I love those books, you read them too?
Jane: No those books are for nerds, but I knew it'd get your attention.

Jane: Wait, the not looking me in the eyes, the nervous tick in your boob.
Brad: That thing's jumpin like Kris Kross.

We were spending 5 grand a month on of the month clubs.

Displaying quotes 25 - 36 of 50 in total

Happy Endings Quotes

Dave: Whore's bath?
Penny: Ah yeah David, I did take a whore's bath okay? I had a one night stand and didn't have time to shower so did I rub some dryer sheets on my pits and throw some water on my hush at Au Bon Pain? Yes I did.

You're sweating on my bruschetta.

Jane [to Brad]