The Big Bang Theory
Thursdays 8:00 PM on CBSFavorite Leonard Hofstadter Quotes
Leonard: I love you, but I will not marry you.
Penny: Thank you.
Leonard: Now about that second proposal, on the one hand...
"Let's just get this over with." Am I driving you to the Cheesecake Factory, or are we having sex?
Penny: Leonard, will you marry me?
Leonard: Hmm.
Leonard: I regret not saying "yes"when you asked me to marry you.
Penny: Well, it just wasn't the right time.
Leonard: Yeah.
Penny: And this is also not the right time. Do not propose.
Leonard: What?
Penny: I know that face. That's your propose face.
Penny: There's no reason why I shouldn't be the best bisexual go-go dancer slowly transforming into a killer gorilla
anyone's ever seen.
Leonard: I don't know. The bisexual gorilla go-go dancer in Schindler's List is tough to beat.
Sheldon: Ah, very good. Because a gorilla go-go dancer
of any sexual preference would be out of place in a film about the Holocaust.
Leonard: It only gets funnier when you explain it, Sheldon.
Sheldon: I know.
When I die, you can rent a bounce house.
I hope it's just a sprain. I cannot walk into that ER with another video game injury.
Leonard: Penny and I have some big news.
Penny: We're engaged!
Raj: And I thought me having sex with Emily was gonna be the big news.
Sheldon: She's spent many nights here, and you're worried about preserving the myth of her virginity before the wedding.
Leonard: I'm not.
Sheldon: Good, because not only has that ship sailed, if it hit an iceberg, countless men would perish.
Leonard's Mom: Leonard, would it make you feel better to hear that your mother approved of your life choices?
Leonard: Yes, it would.
Leonard's Mom: Yeah. Well, you should work on that.
Leonard: I know his password, so I can track his phone.
Penny: You do that?
Leonard: Not always, but ever since he wandered off at the swap meet chasing a balloon, I get worried.
Penny: He can take care of himself. Look, we went over stranger danger and gave him that whistle.
Leonard: So a few things don't go your way and your best decision is to ride the rails like a hobo?
Sheldon: I suppose it is. Except I have a credit card. And I refuse to carry my laptop at the end of a stick. And I'd sooner die than eat beans out of a can.
