Favorite Lucille Quotes
Lucille: You might want to let that fire go out before you stick your face in it.
Lindsay: Ah, that's funny. Because I was going to say, you might want to lean away from that fire since you're soaked in alcohol.
Lucille: Mine was better.
Lucille: Your father with his disgusting tweaking. I couldn't breast feed any of you kids because of that man.
(Everyone groans except for Barry)
Barry: They still look fabulous.
Lucille: When's the last time you went on a date?
Michael: I just haven't met anybody who's not completely self-absorbed and impossible to have a conversation with.
Lucille: If that's a veiled criticism about me, I won't hear it and I won't respond to it.
Lucille: (about Lucille 2) She changed him as a baby!
Michael: Ok, that's about the creepiest thing I've ever heard.
Buster: That's why she didn't look surprised.
Buster: Where'd Annyong get that juice box?
Annyong: Annyong.
Lucille: Those are for his soccer team. No sugar for you. You just get more awful.
Lucille: I want you out of the house.
Oscar: Oh, I want you everywhere.
Lucille: Buster, what's going on? What happened to your head?
Buster: Nothing. Gob was just teaching me how to hit it with a hammer.
Michael: You were flying today, buddy.
Buster: Yes, I was flying. But a little too close to the sun.
Lucille: You let him go in the sun? (To Buster) Get in the back seat. I'll be right out.
Buster: Front seat, mom. I sit in the front seat now.
Lucille: Buster's been humping the widow Austero.
Buster: Mom ...
George, Sr.: Is that true?
Buster: No. We're taking it slow.
Lucille: He stays there sometimes until 7:00, 8:00 at night. Peanut brittle on his breath. Is she the one who's going to take him to the dentist?
Buster: She already has.
Lucille: And I'm putting Buster in charge.
Gob: He's a good choice.
Michael: Buster? The guy who thought that the blue on the map was land?
Gob: And if I'm going to be staying here...
Lucille: Staying here? What, did that Mexican throw you out?
Gob: She's not "that Mexican", Mom. She's my Mexican. And she's Colombian or something. Anyway, it's over.
Lucille: You've got three days.
Gob: Hey... If I can't find a horny immigrant by then, I don't deserve to stay here.
George Sr.: Hi ... This is not what it looks like ...
Lucille: It looks like you're tweaking her nipples through a chain-link fence.
George Sr.: Yep ... Yeah, that's it.
