Desperate Housewives

Sundays 9:00 PM on ABC

Lynette Scavo Quotes (Page 2)

Season 7, Episode 9: "Pleasant Little Kingdom"

Lynette: Tom's packing! We're talking big—circus big! So big that he can drive in the carpool lane when he's alone! If it falls in the forest, believe me: It makes a sound. The Washington Monument looks at it and says, 'I want to be you when I grow up!'
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Season 7, Episode 4: "The Thing That Counts is What's Inside"

Lynette [to Penny]: Your job is to watch television and eat way too much candy and my job is to make sure that's all your job is.
• Rating: Unrated

Season 7, Episode 3: "Truly Content"

Tom: I'm taking the necessary precautions.
Lynette: The necessary precautions being your own weight in cheese doodles?
• Rating: Unrated

Season 7, Episode 1: "Remember Paul?"

Lynette: Renee was always the one with the fashion sense. Before I met her, I'd never even heard of Gucci or Prada... or Chlamydia.
• Rating: Unrated

Season 6, Episode 19: "We All Deserve to Die"

Lynette [to Preston]: Try not to take too long because I miss you already.
• Rating: Unrated

Season 6, Episode 17: "Chromolume #7"

Tom: So, Paris, Prague, Madrid... it sounds like you guys saw everything.
Lynette: But you still haven't told us how you two met.
Preston: Well, uh, the first time I saw Irina was on a beach in Nice.
Irina: It was, uh, how you say in english? The... (she gestures)
Tom: T-topless?
Irina: Yes!
Lynette: Oh, you really did see everything.
• Rating: Unrated

Season 6, Episode 16: "The Chase"

Lynette: Think of a world where the toilet seat is never up! This is our time to take them down!
• Rating: 5.0 / 5.0

Tom: How could you forget her birthday?
Lynette: I'm pregnant. I forget pants sometimes.
• Rating: Unrated

Season 6, Episode 15: "Lovely"

Lynette: We'd hoped that it'd be another year before we had the parent-son conversation where we tell you not to offer your neighbor money for sex, but...
• Rating: Unrated