Molly: Why don't you stay with your mom tomorrow night?
Mike: For the same reason I don't chew on tinfoil or try to kiss bears.

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I wanted a few soft ringlets around my face, not a head full of curly fries!

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If I get hit by lightning between here and the altar, which based on the day I've been having could very well happen, I want you to know that you're the love of my life.

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