Mondays 9:00 PM on CBS
Mike-and-molly

Molly: Did Mike call?
Victoria: No, but my pot dealer did. He said you can have your wedding in his basement grow room.
Molly: Oh good. Well, at least the lighting will be good!

Mike: Maybe if you had talked a little less and listened a little more we wouldn't be in this mess!
Molly: Really?
Mike: Listen, I don't want a big fight.
Molly: Well, it's too late for that.

Molly: The senior center said we can get married there. Good news: they have a dance floor. Bad news: lots of people have died on it.

Peggy: Just make sure he knows that you two are good Catholics and that you're not living together in sin.
Molly: But I'm not and we are!

Peggy: Either call him by his Christian name, Jim, or his full name, James Douglas McAthur Biggs.
Molly: Jim it is.

Joyce: Remember when I took you kids to the circus, and we saw that big bear on a unicycle?
Molly: Yeah...what does that have to do with anything?
Joyce: Beats me. It just popped into my head.

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