Modern Family
Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABCPopular Phil Dunphy Quotes
Point is- a guy like me gets that lucky, he quits while he's ahead.
Claire: You've never stolen anything before?
Phil: Only my entire high school production of The Wiz.
Claire: Phil, honey, when I’m not home I need you to be present and keep track of everyone.
Phil: Sounds good. Love you too.
If you can't beat em, drone em!
Wait, does that mean you also didn't like my bagpiping? Is that why we have Luke?
Phil: Then today it's, "everything I can do you can do better."
Luke: No, I can't.
Phil: Yes, you can.
[Singing] You are not the man you used to be. You get up four times at night to pee. Ba da dum da dum tat ta ta ta. You're super duper old now.
You know what a human pyramid is without hours of training? Ten obituaries!
If God wants a hamburger, this is what she cooks it on!
When it comes to wine, this woman doesn't see color. She'll drink anything you put in front of her.
Claire: We were called into Principal Brown's office one week before Alex's graduation.
Phil: That can only mean one of two things. Either she's going to be valedictorian, or they're giving an award for sexiest dad.
Congrats! I'm gonna roll away before you spit on my screen again!
