Modern Family
Wednesdays 9:00 PM on ABCPhil Dunphy Quotes
You know what's really sad? The end of Titantic.
Phil: Hey momma bear, you okay?
Claire: Not with momma bear I'm not.
"My wife won't let me go to Vegas." Trust me that is not a phone call you want to make to a group of ex-college male cheerleaders. They will mock you with a hurtful rhythmic taunt.
I remember the speech that won me treasurer of my high school spanish club. "Mi nombre es filipe."
They're monsters, Claire! Deceitful, manipulative monsters and they need to be broken.
Alex: Dad, we haven't had lunch yet.
Phil: Neither have half the kids in Africa. Stop yappin' and get back to work.
You poked the bear girls! You poked him!
Note to Claire, if you want intense family drama, rent spy kids.
Jay: How much longer do I have to listen to the Julia Child impression?
Phil: For as long as it's still funny.
Jay: I think the timer just went off on that.
Phil: It's the 21st century. You should get a pair.
Jay: I was gonna suggest the same thing.
Gloria: I said I was sorry! But I've had them since I was two. Huge ones!
Phil: What is she...?
Claire: Earrings, Phil. Earrings.
You know why else he's gonna be ok? Because somewhere out there is a little girl who's making lists and labeling bins...and he's gonna find her.
