The Big Bang Theory
Thursdays 8:00 PM on CBSPopular Rajesh "Raj" Koothrappali Quotes
Howard: They're not dating. They're just two friends who went out to dinner.
Raj: And then went back to the home they share where they probably fell asleep in the matching pajamas she got them because they both just love penguins.
Howard: Hey, lots of people wear matching pajamas who aren't dating.
Raj: Like who?
Howard: Like you and your dog.
Leonard: Don't rule out the dating.
You know, I thought cleaning out a dead professor's office was gonna just be boring, but then I found his dentures and realized it's also gross.
Raj: This old pen kind of proves gravity. When I tilt it, her bathing suit falls right off.
Howard: Oh, my dad used to have a pen like that. I dated it all through sixth grade.
Raj: When stuff like this gets me down, you know what I like to do?
Howard: Sing "Hakuna Matata" like an eight-year-old girl?
Raj: Wrong, smarty-pants. It's "Everything Is Awesome" from The Lego Movie.
Leonard: What if... what if this is the thing that would've finally let him open that bottle of champagne?
Raj: Maybe he didn't know what to pair champagne with. Strawberries, caviar, oysters. All good choices. Yeah, that look right there is why people eat before they come to your parties.
Raj: No, I'm not okay. I feel like I'm going to jump out of my skin.
Bernadette: I told you not to wax down there.
What kind of scientist are you? everyone knows you've gotta make two out of three!
Leonard: Stephen Hawking liked our paper. Said the premise is intriguing.
Sheldon: Good to see you again, Mr. Stephen-Hawking- Liked-Our-Paper.
Leonard: And you as well, Mr. Our-Premise-Is-Intriguing.
Howard: How do you do, Mr. I'll- Admit-That's-Pretty-Cool?
Raj: Yeah, you keep setting me up for failure.
Raj: The guy who plays Jon Snow was a jerk and we still watch Game of Thrones.
Leonard: He was a jerk because you rear-ended him.
Raj: I was distracted. It's weird seeing a member of the Night's Watch with kayak strapped to his car.
Nathan Fillion: Oh, umm. I think you made a mistake. I'm not an actor.
Raj: Don't say that. You're not Dame Judi Dench but you're pretty great.
Nathan Fillion: How about a guy who looks like Nathan Fillion, but a little more annoyed than Nathan Fillion usually is?
Leonard: What do you think?
Raj: Aww. That's good enough for Facebook.
What if he's in prison? What if he's a spy? What if he's in a Beatles cover band? I'm just saying if he's got your nose and haircut, he'd make a killer Ringo.
